Another way of looking at depression

[Jackalope]

Thanks, guys.

Yeah, it was rough.  But I just tell myself that there are many people around the globe that go through much worse on a daily basis.  It's a brutal world out there and I consider myself lucky if that's the extent of If have to endure.  It's been 14 years now, so I have 99.9% coped with it, Every once in a while the pain will come back like if I have a dream with him in it.  The images I saw that day, while not quite as crystal clear as they were for the first few years afterwards, are still quite prevalent in my mind.  It was weird, because the looks on the faces of my family and friends said that they expected me to be next, since I had already tried to kill myself once before.  I swore to prove them wrong and used their expectation of my suicide as a motivator.  I was also resolved to never, ever consider suicide after seeing first hand all the pain that was spread around to his friends and family.

It definitely made me a much stronger person.

I don't know if I ever told you this but I found my mother after she attempted suicide thirty some years ago. She lived, but that touched me in some very profound ways that are still with me today. Likewise, that experience has been enough to keep me alive through some very dark times when I think I otherwise might not.