What distinguishes a fantasy book from the bible?

[DeistPaladin]

I share the sentiment of the OP. It amazes me that Christians can hold up the Bible and say with a straight face, "historical documents". It reminds me of that sci-fi spoof movie where an alien race watches and earth TV show and thinks it's all real.

These same Christians give me an incredulous look whenever I use the term "mythology" to describe the Bible and can't understand why I would compare it to the Iliad and Odyssey. Then they use their folklore about the suffering martyrs of the "early church" as proof of their own mythology. Then they give you that same deer-in-the-headlights look when you ask how the alleged early Christian martyrs were any different from Jim Jones, David Koresh and other cultists who "died for their lies". It's like they're completely oblivious to the massive special pleading at work in their own minds.

Quick review of the major events contained in these "historical documents":

• The Creation Myth
  
• The Tower of Babel
  
• The Global Flood
  
• The Jewish Slaves in Egypt
  
• The Ten Curses and Exodus
  
• The Bloody Trail to the Promised Land
  
• The Glorious Empire of David
  
• The Life of Jesus
  

First, we have the myth of the Creation in Genesis, or two separate myths rammed together, the junction being in Gen 2:3-4. If you look closely, you can almost see the splice marks between these two verses. Do I really need to elaborate on this one? Even many Christians now regard it as a metaphor, a view not shared by Paul or the Gospel authors.

Second, we have a tower that was going to reach up into Heaven. Yahweh is frightened by that and curses humanity to have many languages. We know that towers can't be built to reach the sky and languages formed over time as populations are separated.

Third, we have the supposed Jewish slaves in Egypt who went from 70 to 1.2 million in four generations, a figure which only makes sense if every Jewish female was constantly pregnant with twins.

There is no historical proof of the supposed ten curses, which included such dramatic events as the Nile turning to blood and every first born being killed. Nobody recorded these events? There is also no proof of the Jewish march across the Sinai despite an extensive search by archeologists.

There is no record of any swath of destruction led by Joshua. Neither is there any proof of a Jewish empire that spanned the eastern coast of the Med.

Finally, there is no evidence of a wonderworker who brought back the dead, healed the sick, cast out demons and flew up into the sky at the end. If there was a character on whom the myths are based, nobody seemed to notice him at the time.

I would like to live in a truly rational world where anyone who seriously holds up the Bible and claims it proves anything about history would simply be laughed out of the room.