Can Someone Explain This To Me?

[I_am_not_mafia]

Note it doesn't mean asexual people do not nevertheless have sexual activities with others (or themselves), whether to impress others, to experiment, etc. It also doesn't mean you can't have romantic attraction to others.

I'm a romantic asexual myself. I have no desire for sex and get bored when I do have it. Honestly there are many things I enjoy doing far more than sex. But I have always wanted a companion to share my life and to be emotionally intimate with so I get classed as a romantic asexual. Yet I acknowledge that my husband is sexual so I occasionally have sex with him. But because I can't muster up any passion (I'm also anorgasmic and have never had an orgasm), I allow him to have sex with other women on condition that it's purely sexual and not a relationship. (I admit I may be naive in that regard).

In terms of the OP and being born a particular way, the leading idea at the moment is that it happens during development in the womb. You shouldn't think of the brain as a single atomic unit but made up of many different parts that each perform a different function or behavioural trait. Some areas will be more or less developed than others as the brain grows in the womb.