How important are you?

[Angrboda]

OP: you've got an internal perception of your self worth, then there is external perception of your worth by others IRL. Your actual self worth/importance is somewhere in between. If your internal perception radically conflicts with IRL perception by others it's going to create some problems for you. This, in part, is of how personality disorders are identified. I believe your behavior indicates that you have one.

Not sure if you were saying this directly to OP or whether this is something that applies generally to all....

"you've got an internal perception of your self worth, then there is external perception of your worth by others IRL. Your actual self worth/importance is somewhere in between."

I want to say that there are some rich and powerful narcissists out there who are surrounded by people who value them highly. In this case, with that particular individual I's say their actual self worth may lie outside those two parameters. Likewise, you may have a nerdy kid with low self esteem who is surrounded by people who ridicule and devalue him. Same deal: actual self worth is not in between others' view and the nerdy kids own view of self worth.

Well, yes, and many of those narcissists would be diagnosable as having a personality disorder. Your counter-example isn't a counter-example. I think it's a bit silly suggesting Ahriman has a personality disorder, especially considering that he has a verifiable Axis 1 diagnosis of bipolar disorder, but your defense isn't particularly helpful.