Why is life worth living as an atheist?

[Annik]

I didn't need to subscribe to any particular philosophy to make me a nice girl and a doormat

I don't believe my being a deterministic existential nihilist has benefitted my life at all. For the most part, I recognize that what I believe if pressed has little bearing upon my appreciation for my life. It doesn't consume me, it is simply as much an inherent part of me as being a woman, loving pizza, and having silvery-blond hair.

It will obviously not be the same story for all people. I see choice and authenticity as the most important. I have a lot of respect for other people's right to choose. You don't hold the same values as I do, so your reaction will obviously be different.

I would ask... precisely what is 'truth'? How does recognizing that meaning is self-derived and otherwise likely nonexistent turn one into a pacifist? It seems just as likely one could take existentialism and be a mass-murdering psychopath... simply because the philosophy makes no claims past itself. It isn't a religion... so why do you hold it so reverently and suggest it has guided you?

Again, my value system is different. I've always disliked the violent side of myself, but I often let it control me. That wasn't really me and if I wanted to be authentic to myself, I had to do something about it. I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't use some kind of force to defend myself or my loved ones, so I dubbed it a "cautious" pacifism. Life has always been important to me and it got even more important with the loss of my faith. I was a existentialist before I knew what existentialism was, but there are finer parts (such as the question of authenticity and the topic of angst) I was not as familiar with. It made sense to me and I became a little more committed to choice and authenticity than some other parts. Furthermore, there are many different kinds of existentialist (as that variety in the most popular existential authors clearly show). My friend is not the same type of existentialist that I am, but we hold the same kind of umbrella beliefs (although he has a tendency to apply them in ways that are radically different than my own). I'm not sure of all the fancy terms used to describe specific kind of existentialism I practice, because it's not as important to me, but I don't believe I am deterministic (within the boundaries of physics, of course). Choice is all I have to define myself with and I am comfortable with that.

Respect my opinions all ya like, I'm still asking questions when people say strange things

As, but normal is what everyone is and you are not. "Strange" is relative.