Ask a transsexual anything

[Violet]

I don't think the problem is that s/he might have put herself at more risk. It's more how unspeakably cruel it is to say that to a victim of rape. Rape victims already put up with a lot of self-blame, they shouldn't be told more ways in which they can blame themselves. It's impossible to change the past, anyway, and in the end they're the victim regardless of why they were victimized.

Well, obviously... the problem is that there's someone who was willing to rape them/steal from them/murder them/etc. If we didn't live in a world where people did these things, then actions/appearances could not contribute to their occurrence.

... No kidding that victims (of various offenses, rape is a severe example) put up with a lot of self-blame. I'm not unconnected from this specific example, and yet I don't think it's cruel to observe that various actions on my part influenced (however slightly) whether or not <event> occurred. And I'm not about to engage in special pleading for being hurt by said event(s)

Not much for consolation, but... in torture: nobody escapes unaffected; not the tortured, not the torturer.