I am new here, this is my first post. I am also not going to lie, this is for selfish reasons. It will make me feel better to discuss my situation amongst those who are like me, as opposed to my family members and friends.
My grandmother was admitted to the hospital last evening after suffering a fall. From some experience in pathology, I know that most of the times when an elderly person falls, there is more going on than just taking a spill.
My father called me to inform me of what was transpiring, but assured me that she was in good care. The doctors ran a few tests and found she has pneumonia, but suspect other issues; as she is in here 80s and has been smoking since she could damn near walk. Regardless, I called the hospital to leave a positive message with her, hoping that she would at least know I am wishing her well.
This afternoon my father called me to let me know her time is ending near, and that hospice or a nursing home would be the best option for her; he is opting for the latter. He let me know the doctors believe she only has a few weeks left. Then he asked me to pray for her. My old man knows that I am an atheist, I have been for some time now. It's not a fad, it wasn't an overnight "rebellious" moment in my teenage years.
Instead of arguing with him, as it is his mother, I did what most frustrated people do- take to the internet. I am saddened by the fact that my grandmother will die; it is unfortunate, but that is the way of life. I try to look back and cherish a moment that I could muster, but there aren't any. Her and I were never close. But what when she found out my wife and I are expecting in April, she was ecstatic, happier than I'd ever seen or heard her (it was all over the phone), and could not wait to be a great grandmother. Now I am crushed in knowing that chances are she will never see my son.
But then I go back to how pissed I am at my old man. If this is truly "god's plan," taking this woman's life, then why would I pray? What good would that do? Would I convince this all knowing, all being, whatever deity that she should live a little longer? Wouldn't that violate his master plan? So what the hell would praying do if there was a god? Nothing.
Now I am beginning to receive messages from my family and religious friends, how they are praying for my family. While I am honored they would give up a solid 30 seconds to mumble some nonsense into the sky, I think that time would be better spent doing other things... like wiping one more time for good measure. Really anything.
Beyond this rant, my underlying question to all of you is how do you deal with religious people during your time of grief?
Thank you for reading, and maybe laughing at one point or another.
My grandmother was admitted to the hospital last evening after suffering a fall. From some experience in pathology, I know that most of the times when an elderly person falls, there is more going on than just taking a spill.
My father called me to inform me of what was transpiring, but assured me that she was in good care. The doctors ran a few tests and found she has pneumonia, but suspect other issues; as she is in here 80s and has been smoking since she could damn near walk. Regardless, I called the hospital to leave a positive message with her, hoping that she would at least know I am wishing her well.
This afternoon my father called me to let me know her time is ending near, and that hospice or a nursing home would be the best option for her; he is opting for the latter. He let me know the doctors believe she only has a few weeks left. Then he asked me to pray for her. My old man knows that I am an atheist, I have been for some time now. It's not a fad, it wasn't an overnight "rebellious" moment in my teenage years.
Instead of arguing with him, as it is his mother, I did what most frustrated people do- take to the internet. I am saddened by the fact that my grandmother will die; it is unfortunate, but that is the way of life. I try to look back and cherish a moment that I could muster, but there aren't any. Her and I were never close. But what when she found out my wife and I are expecting in April, she was ecstatic, happier than I'd ever seen or heard her (it was all over the phone), and could not wait to be a great grandmother. Now I am crushed in knowing that chances are she will never see my son.
But then I go back to how pissed I am at my old man. If this is truly "god's plan," taking this woman's life, then why would I pray? What good would that do? Would I convince this all knowing, all being, whatever deity that she should live a little longer? Wouldn't that violate his master plan? So what the hell would praying do if there was a god? Nothing.
Now I am beginning to receive messages from my family and religious friends, how they are praying for my family. While I am honored they would give up a solid 30 seconds to mumble some nonsense into the sky, I think that time would be better spent doing other things... like wiping one more time for good measure. Really anything.
Beyond this rant, my underlying question to all of you is how do you deal with religious people during your time of grief?
Thank you for reading, and maybe laughing at one point or another.
