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Family not accepting you're an Atheist
#1
Family not accepting you're an Atheist
Hello,

Does anyone have a difficult family that won't accept you're an Atheist? I've always been an Atheist, but my family all believe in a higher power. I don't mind people believing different to me (as long as they don't get abusive about it in any way), but they simply can't comprehend that I'm an Atheist - if it's ever mentioned they imply I'm in denial, which is ridiculous. I am more looking for input from someone in a similar position on how to approach this better mentally, not holding my breath though as I can see the forum is inactive.

Best Wishes

TheEnd8888
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#2
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
This particular "Atheism" section is not as active as others, but everyone will see a new topic. (It just often isn't as exciting to talk about atheism with atheists).

My family is atheist, except for my mother, so I have no problems. Now friends - that's something I don't talk about much.

Here is a list of things some theists think about atheists:

1) You have been led astray by Satan
2) You just want to be free to sin
3) God is trying to call you, and you just need some words from me to save you.

Parents feel its their job to protect and guide. Having a child potentially go to hell leads to a feeling of failure. I would just say "an all-knowing and loving god would understand why I don't believe in it, and not hold it against me".
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#3
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
My hometown didn't have many atheists (at least not outspoken atheists).

My sister had a problem with me being an atheist. She was a devout Catholic. My mom just preferred I went along and pretended. My dad, who separated from mom was some kind of deist (to hear him tell it) but I think his religion was Idon'tgiveafuckism. He didn't care that I was an atheist.

So your parents can be coming from different angles in their resistance. There are social pressures (like my mom was considering to exclusion of all else) and there are true-to-form "I believe this shit" concerns. Which do you think we are dealing with more here? (It could be a blend of the two.)
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#4
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
I grew up evangelical Christian. 100% of my family is still Christian. 99% of every person I know is Christian. I personally know maybe a dozen or so agnostics or atheists. For years I tried to walk on egg shells around them but they always took every opportunity to behave as if their position was correct be default and never consider my position. Eventually I just said fuck it, I'm an atheist and I don't care what you think. Live with it or get out of my way. It helps to arm yourself with just about every form of education you can muster. Christians will bombard atheists with their faux knowledge and it's quite entertaining to be able to spot such ignorance and call them on it. It's also vastly entertaining how little most of them actually know about their dark age cult.
Why is it so?
~Julius Sumner Miller
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#5
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
I don't give a fuck.
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#6
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
(August 10, 2021 at 4:28 pm)HappySkeptic Wrote: This particular "Atheism" section is not as active as others, but everyone will see a new topic. (It just often isn't as exciting to talk about atheism with atheists).

My family is atheist, except for my mother, so I have no problems.  Now friends - that's something I don't talk about much.

Here is a list of things some theists think about atheists:

1) You have been led astray by Satan
2) You just want to be free to sin
3) God is trying to call you, and you just need some words from me to save you.

Parents feel its their job to protect and guide.  Having a child potentially go to hell leads to a feeling of failure.  I would just say "an all-knowing and loving god would understand why I don't believe in it, and not hold it against me".
That might be it. Great post.

(August 10, 2021 at 4:38 pm)vulcanlogician Wrote: My hometown didn't have many atheists (at least not outspoken atheists).

My sister had a problem with me being an atheist. She was a devout Catholic. My mom just preferred I went along and pretended. My dad, who separated from mom was some kind of deist (to hear him tell it) but I think his religion was Idon'tgiveafuckism. He didn't care that I was an atheist.

So your parents can be coming from different angles in their resistance. There are social pressures (like my mom was considering to exclusion of all else) and there are true-to-form "I believe this shit" concerns. Which do you think we are dealing with more here? (It could be a blend of the two.)
Not sure.
(August 10, 2021 at 5:06 pm)Spongebob Wrote: I grew up evangelical Christian.  100% of my family is still Christian.  99% of every person I know is Christian.  I personally know maybe a dozen or so agnostics or atheists.  For years I tried to walk on egg shells around them but they always took every opportunity to behave as if their position was correct be default and never consider my position.  Eventually I just said fuck it, I'm an atheist and I don't care what you think.  Live with it or get out of my way.  It helps to arm yourself with just about every form of education you can muster.  Christians will bombard atheists with their faux knowledge and it's quite entertaining to be able to spot such ignorance and call them on it.  It's also vastly entertaining how little most of them actually know about their dark age cult.
Yes, Christianity doesn't have a great history.
(August 10, 2021 at 5:11 pm)no one Wrote: I don't give a fuck.
no one
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#7
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
(August 10, 2021 at 3:28 pm)TheEnd8888 Wrote: Hello,

Does anyone have a difficult family that won't accept you're an Atheist? I've always been an Atheist, but my family all believe in a higher power. I don't mind people believing different to me (as long as they don't get abusive about it in any way), but they simply can't comprehend that I'm an Atheist - if it's ever mentioned they imply I'm in denial, which is ridiculous. I am more looking for input from someone in a similar position on how to approach this better mentally, not holding my breath though as I can see the forum is inactive.

Best Wishes

TheEnd8888

Actually the most recent part of my life, is a younger sister whom told me she had "become" an atheist years ago, just a couple years ago now claims she is not. I mark that up to the fact, unfortunately, she lost both her adoptive father and mother. I am quite confident that her "sudden" backslide into god belief was a result of PTSD.
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#8
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
(August 10, 2021 at 6:39 pm)Brian37 Wrote:
(August 10, 2021 at 3:28 pm)TheEnd8888 Wrote: Hello,

Does anyone have a difficult family that won't accept you're an Atheist? I've always been an Atheist, but my family all believe in a higher power. I don't mind people believing different to me (as long as they don't get abusive about it in any way), but they simply can't comprehend that I'm an Atheist - if it's ever mentioned they imply I'm in denial, which is ridiculous. I am more looking for input from someone in a similar position on how to approach this better mentally, not holding my breath though as I can see the forum is inactive.

Best Wishes

TheEnd8888

Actually the most recent part of my life, is a younger sister whom told me she had "become" an atheist years ago, just a couple years ago now claims she is not. I mark that up to the fact, unfortunately, she lost both her adoptive father and mother. I am quite confident that her "sudden" backslide into god belief was a result of PTSD.
Maybe she wanted you to disagree with her (when she claimed she is now not) and convince her for sure on Atheism. Not sure.
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#9
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
Start by telling them that religion/atheism can no longer be an issue when you/they are around, or on the phone, or over the net. If it starts, you will ghost. But remember, you have to hold up your end also. 

Worked for me at age 13. Still working for we with a catholic wife and lutheran sister.
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem




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#10
RE: Family not accepting you're an Atheist
I raised two atheists and one who goes to church when it suits her.

Was not really an issue though raised Catholic. Dad told me he was atheist a couple years before he died. Apparently my Methodist mother attends church now...hedging her bets I assume. Religion was never something she cared about when I was growing up.

Husband holds some belief but we don't discuss it often.
 “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.” ~Albert Einstein                                                 
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