Losing Faith Complicates Mental Health Recovery?

[LivingNumbers6.626]

I'm very sorry to hear how it has affected you. I have heard similar stories many times on the Atheist Experience, how religion has been so drilled in that pulling it out is painful and leaves wounds.

It's very sad that religious people will take advantage of your situation and try to say you "just need god again". Religion has nothing to do with god, it's just poison like you say. It's control, power and delusion.

I hope things improve for you, I empathize as I too am severely depressed, I'm on very high doses of anti depressants (I have M.E. and most likely a genetic vulnerability to depression). All I can suggest is to try to meet up with as many atheists as possible, try to form a new social framework of people who care about you as a person, not just because of dumbass beliefs. If anyone treats you worse because you have left religion, they are a despicable person and are just proving that "religious person" is not the same as "good person". In fact I have generally found the opposite to be the case. The more religious someone is, the nicer they are not.

Keep posting on here, and focus on the fact that you now live in reality. I know that can be hard, I find depression gives me a hyper awareness of reality. It's more difficult to brush aside the horrible things in the world.

Thank you for being so open and encouraging.

I would concur, depression often does perpetuate a hyper awareness of reality.

May I ask if your depression has been perpetuated due to a religious past?

For me, I was originally diagnosed with major depression and general anxiety but after leaving church 2 years after diagnoses I was then diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD). I really hate labels and diagnoses, it doesn't solve the problem, but it's helping me understand my problem on a deeper level. It would make sense that while never having an identity and then leaving one that was assumed (mormonism) would really make one with BPD become severely symptomatic.

But yeah, I've been doing my best to stay involved and create a new community.

After nearly being homeless and being unemployed, I moved away from the city, back to the country with my parents, found a job, and now I'm just trying to distract myself with writing, music, and studying for my tech certifications.

Luckily, my family, for being mormon, have been pretty awesome. My extended family on the other end...not so much. Or atleast they have a funny way of being supportive.

I'm just really looking for that day when my life will be balanced again.

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I left mormonism, had been depressed two years before then, and when I left things got worse.

Anyone else experienced this?

Anyone ever felt so insecure and empty after leaving an extremist dogma?

I think, especially in the case of mormonism, the practitioner of any serious sect has to sacrifice their identity for the sake of the church. For someone who has mental health issues, this creates another bag of problems to heals.

Just a thought.

Religion is poison.

I don't blame it, I take responsibility for my own fate and emotions, but I think things would be easier without the dogmatic variable of absolute servitude.

It's understandable.

As a member of an organised religion with strict doctrine you are likely to have been subject to something called 'impairment of autonomy'. As you were already experiencing depression and most likely a sense of lack of control over things that affect your life (lack of autonomy), any further loss of control i.e. the removal of the religious doctrine that propped up areas of your fragile psychology, would have stripped the autonomy you retained of any meaningful context and led to a sense of even less control (less autonomy) and possibly more depression.

Which seems to be the case.

Psychological states rarely change overnight, it takes time to repair and heal. The more your life outside of organised religion takes shape and becomes more concrete, the more your feeling of autonomy will return.

You will be fine, just be patient with yourself and your recovery. See a doctor about some meds to help you through the depression, if you have a headache you take something for it, phycology is no different.

MM

Thank you so much for your thoughtful response.

You're right. It will take a long time. We're talking 20 years and a half living under the same controlling dogma and culture structure.

Also, it's funny you've mentioned autonomy. I think you nailed it right on the head. I don't think I have ever felt a sense of autonomy. So on the bright side, it's comforting to know that after living in a fallacious and irrational lifestyle as a person who is always acted upon, I am now learning to be the person who acts. Instead of blaming and being victim to emotion, I'm trying to be the person who acts.

Anyways, I've been off of meds for about 4 months now. I've tried many medications, including medical marijuana, but so far nothing works better than coping techniques. But if things get worse, I will definitely be looking into better medication.