Would you date a theist?

[Rhizomorph13]

Or rather... I should say I did have a dumb ass...

Did you teach it to talk?

Cool...........

You'll have to post a vid.

I knew a man who taught his asshole how to talk; his abdomen would jiggle up and down as he farted out the words. Pretty cool trick really. After a while it grew pointy toothlike structures and would chew through his pants. He included it in the act and would talk back and forth with it. It would throw the gags back in his face every time.

Problem was that it started getting lonely. It wanted to be kissed and loved, just like any other mouth. It would go on crying jags and keep the man up nights wailing that it wasn't loved. He tried shoving things up it, candles, cucumbers, whatever would fit, but it wouldn't stay quite for long. The asshole made threats and the man would argue with it day and night. "In the end it will be YOU who is silent." said the asshole. In the morning the man found a slippery substance like a tadpoles tail had grow over his mouth. He wiped it off but every morning thereafter it would grow back thicker and more persistent. Eventually he couldn't remove it and for a while you could see the suffering in his eyes. Eventually the suffering winked out; the eyes went cold, and grey.

Teaching your ass how to talk is certainly not a good idea,
Rhizo