Joke

[Minimalist]

A little boy was waiting for his mother to come out of the
grocery store. As he waited, he was approached by a man who asked, "Son, can you tell me where the Post Office is?"

The little boy replied, "Sure! Just go straight down this street a coupla blocks and turn to your right."

The man thanked the boy kindly and said, "I'm the new pastor in town.
I'd like for you to come to church on Sunday. I'll show you how to get to Heaven."

The little boy replied with a chuckle.
"You're bullshitting me, right? You don't even know the way to the Post Office”

[Cato]

I think I heard this from Gilbert Gottfried:

Little Boy: Mom, where do babies come from?

Mom: Well, the storks bring them.

Little Boy: Well, in that case, who's fucking all the storks?

[KUSA]

A little boy is standing on top of a cliff, looking down at the sea and crying his eyes out. A priest approaches and says, "My child, why are you so upset?"

The little boy turns to him and says, "My mummy and daddy were in their car -- and it just rolled over the cliff and smashed on the rocks down there."

The priest slowly looks around him while unbuttoning his cassock and says, "It's just not your day, is it?"

[truthBtold]

A priest was walking down the street and saw a kid selling newborn kittens. The priest said, what kind of kittens are they? The kid says.. their christians kittens!. The next day the priest had to come back with a few more priest to show them and he asked the kid again.. what kind of kittens are they? The kid said.. their atheist kittens!. The priest said.. What a minute, yeaterday u said they were christian kittens.. the kid said yes but today they OPENED their eyes......

[Cyberman]

Jesus walks into a bar and asks for a glass of water. The barman serves him and with a wave of his hand, Jesus turns it into wine.

The barman says "Hey, hang about pal - what do you think you're doing?"

Jesus says "What, you think I'm paying your fuckin' prices?"

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

A little Catholic boy and a little Protestant girl meet up on the beach in Northern Ireland. They become play mates, and (as generally happens in jokes like this) the little boy makes the obligatory I'll-show-you-mine-if-you-show-me-yours offer.

The little girl agrees, and in under a minute, they're both as naked as the day they were born. The little boy has a good, long look and says, 'I'll be damned. Mum was right - there IS a world of difference between a Catholic and a Protestant!!'

Boru

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

The Pope is working in his office, pretending it's 1485, as per usual. A cardinal bursts in and says, 'Your Holiness, a miracle! Our Lord and Savior Jesus has returned to us! He's in St Peter's Square at this very moment, riding a donkey and blessing the crowds. Holy Father, what should we do?'

The Pope thinks a moment and says, 'Look busy?'

Boru

[A Theist]

Hillbilly goes to the doctor because he has some itching and burning in his ass. The doc checks him out and says, "Buddy, you got hemorrhoids. I'm going to give you some suppositories. I want you to take them three times a day for a week and then come back and see me". After a week the Hillbilly goes back and the doctor asks, "How did those suppositories work out for you?" The Hillbilly answered, "Doc, they didn't work fer nothin'! I took them thangs with water, I took 'em with milk, I took 'em with coffee...for all the good they done me, I shoulda stuck 'em up my ass!"

[Minimalist]

A man walks out to the street and immediately catches a taxi, just about to go by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "What perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman... he did everything right, every time. Like my
coming along just when you needed a cab, things happened like that to
Frank Feldman every single time."

Passenger: "Everybody has some problems."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like Pavarotti, and danced like Astaire. And you should have heard him play the piano!"

Passenger: "Sounds like he was really special."

Cabbie: "Oh hell there's more. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and which fork to eat it with. And whatever broke, he could fix it -- Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."

Passenger: "Wow, what a guy!"

Cabbie: "PLUS -- Frank really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel special. He would never argue back, even if she was in the wrong and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He NEVER made a mistake! No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman!"

Passenger: "What an amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well... I never actually met Frank. He died, and I married his wife."

[Angrboda]

Took me a moment to get that one. I'm a bit slow.