Why did God murder children for making fun of a bald guy?

[Chad32]

Yeah, because Elisha was just defending himself, in fear for his life. They were threatening him physically too, you see? I'm not sure where it says they were doing more than just calling him bald, but he definitely wasn't calling Yahweh's wrath down on a bunch of preteens for a small insult.

[Cinjin]

Yeah it's in the thread Rahul. Elisha had da powaz already as a prophet, which gave him direct responsibility for them. He abused his powers to do evil. He was at fault.

What?? This is odd. How can this be? We have two Christians that disagree with each other about the truth and meaning of this savage story. Certainly your god, in all his omniscient brilliance would be able to relay a story that would be clear and concise for all his flock? Certainly at least be able to make all the translations correct.
Drich's Horrific Take

I'm going to need to see some credentials. True Christians™ only please.



I'm sure this can be cleared right up if one of you can just show me your badge. It looks like this:

[Minimalist]

Yeah, because Elisha was just defending himself, in fear for his life.

That defense works in Florida.

[Wyrd of Gawd]

2 Kings 2:23-24, “Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up by the way, young lads came out from the city and mocked him and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead; go up, you baldhead!” 24 When he looked behind him and saw them, he cursed them in the name of the LORD. Then two female bears came out of the woods and tore up forty-two lads of their number.”

I love how the murderous, bloodthirsty bears are female as well. Females really can't do anything good in the Bible, can they?

I've heard Christians explain before that 42 is a large number of people, and so God sent the bears to protect the man. So...people are murdered and raped every day, and have been since time began, and yet we see no angry, mauling bears to protect these people?

May I also add, in the passage, the man does not ask for help from God in a frightened way - he curses them, which implies to me he did this in anger, not fear.

Also, how is it even possible that the bears caught ALL 42 of these kids? If two bears came out of nowhere and began to attack your group, wouldn't you run for safety?

The bears would have to be pretty bloody quick to kill 21 each before any of them had time to flee in terror. And we all know fear makes you run fast.

I know it sounds like I'm nitpicking but how can anyone possibly defend or explain this passage?

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Elisha was the Emperor's (aka God) emissary on official business. When the kids insulted him they were insulting the Emperor. Elisha sicced his guards on them and the guards killed the offensive kids.

But as an aside, there were bears in that area in ancient times. The writer probably used bears as a metaphor for how ferociously the guards attacked the kids.

[Drich]

2 Kings 2:23-24, “Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up by the way, young lads came out from the city and mocked him and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead; go up, you baldhead!” 24 When he looked behind him and saw them, he cursed them in the name of the LORD. Then two female bears came out of the woods and tore up forty-two lads of their number.”

I love how the murderous, bloodthirsty bears are female as well. Females really can't do anything good in the Bible, can they?

the female bear is far more aggressive than the males across the board. Google it.

I've heard Christians explain before that 42 is a large number of people, and so God sent the bears to protect the man.

I like that one. I think I will use it.

So...people are murdered and raped every day, and have been since time began, and yet we see no angry, mauling bears to protect these people?

do you not understand who the person these bears was protecting?

Besides when God does stop a rape or murder does it make the news? It is tracked like rapes and murders are? Then from what position can you HONESTLY compare the two?

May I also add, in the passage, the man does not ask for help from God in a frightened way - he curses them, which implies to me he did this in anger, not fear.

indeed.
As was his right as a prophet of God.

I'm not a prophet, but I still get angry when you all obstinately mock the things of God from a position of ignorance and selectively stay there rather than try and reason your way out of your position. If I could call down bears to maul a few of you I think I would have at least a couple of times...

Speaking of which has anyone heard from cinjin lately?
Never mind I see he just posted

Also, how is it even possible that the bears caught ALL 42 of these kids? If two bears came out of nowhere and began to attack your group, wouldn't you run for safety?

maybe God made then fall a sleep.
Or maybe the bears ran out and maimed everyone quickly, and then came back to kill them.

The bears would have to be pretty bloody quick to kill 21 each before any of them had time to flee in terror. And we all know fear makes you run fast.

or it paralizes you. Deer in the headlights...

I know it sounds like I'm nitpicking but how can anyone possibly defend or explain this passage?

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Done, what else you got?

[Zen Badger]

So Drippy, why did your god not just command the kids to stop?

Why did he have to kill them.

Just another demonstration of what a total fuck up your god is.

And what a horrible amoral person you are.

[Bad Writer]

So because he's supposedly a prophet, he gets a free pass when he curses people insomuch that two bears rip into them? What if it was Mohammed in place of Elisha? Let's say Mohammed commanded 2 Jinn to burn a group of young men because they made a snide comment about his short beard. He's supposedly the prophet of Allah; is he justified in crisping these people over mere words?

[Drich]

So Drippy, why did your god not just command the kids to stop?

Why did he have to kill them.

Just another demonstration of what a total fuck up your god is.

And what a horrible amoral person you are.

What would be easier to tell them to stop or to conjour a couple angry bears to kill and eat 42 little monsters?

Looks like the latter of the two.

---

So because he's supposedly a prophet, he gets a free pass when he curses people insomuch that two bears rip into them?

elisha performed some Christ level miricals including causing a 3 year drought, and then making it rain on command, brought fire from Heaven on a company of soldiers, raising people from the dead, healing people, multiplying food etc.. http://www.theseason.org/2kings/miracles.htm
Not to mention called out bears to maul and kill 42 little kids.
So yeah, he was a "supposed" prophet.

What if it was Mohammed in place of Elisha? Let's say Mohammed commanded 2 Jinn to burn a group of young men because they made a snide comment about his short beard. He's supposedly the prophet of Allah; is he justified in crisping these people over mere words?

So.. I would think that is par for the course.[/quote]

[Zen Badger]

So Drippy, why did your god not just command the kids to stop?

Why did he have to kill them.

Just another demonstration of what a total fuck up your god is.

And what a horrible amoral person you are.

What would be easier to tell them to stop or to conjour a couple angry bears to kill and eat 42 little monsters?

Looks like the latter of the two.

Only easier if you're an inept clown.

A truly intelligent deity would have gone for the moral option.

This still makes your god a total cunt.

[Bad Writer]

So because Elisha can do all that stuff, he gets a free pass. This is what you're saying, Drippy. So if I become a mass murderer but do some charity work on the weekends, that's okay as long as my murdering and charity work is in the name of the most powerful, most rich person on earth?