Friends with benefits?

[*Deidre*]

What do you all think about the concept of ‘friends with benefits?’

Asked two of my offline Christian friends and they say it ‘cheapens your worth in a man’s eyes.’
My offline atheist friends say ‘nothing wrong with it, but if feelings emerge, it can ruin the friendships.’

Hmmm. I don’t want to get serious with anyone, but hanging out with someone in a ‘mutually beneficial’ arrangement, sounds…appealing.

Would be interested in your ideas about it, and if you have stories to share of your own. (good or bad)

[kaamil20]

You should to choose friends those give you more benefit in the life.

[tor]

You should to choose friends those give you more benefit in the life.

[No_God]

I don't like the idea. I simply cannot have sex with someone with out falling in complete and total fucking love with them.

I'm weeeeeak

[Losty]

You should to choose friends those give you more benefit in the life.

My thoughts exactly

[Fidel_Castronaut]

I've had a few 'friends with benefits'. One girl I was seeing back as an undergraduate and man, could she fuck. Best sex ever. But we wouldn't have worked as a 'couple'. We were friends for about a year and then just drifted apart.

Our relationship certainly didn't cheapen her in my eyes.

She was a good friend Neither of us were after anything more and when it came to a point in time where she was interested in someone else we called it a day. I intended to stay friends with her but we just drifted apart I guess. We moved away from each other and I met someone else and then life happened.

Someone once described life as simply a chain of connections with people. Some you like, some you don't. I liked her, and she liked me. And that was all we needed. Did I have 'feelings' for her? Of course I did, and I know she had them for me too. But I think part of us not staying together as a couple was that we both knew we weren't that compatible, we just made each other feel good with great sex. I'll be honest, when we stopped seeing each other I felt sad and a little off put. At the time I think I may have wanted more, but I'm older and wiser now and realise that what we had wasn't supposed to last forever. Again, it's what we wanted at the time, and that was enough.

[*Deidre*]

You should to choose friends those give you more benefit in the life.

hmmm. only choose people to be my friends who benefit me?

You should to choose friends those give you more benefit in the life.

welcome back, tor. :p

---

I don't like the idea. I simply cannot have sex with someone with out falling in complete and total fucking love with them.

I'm weeeeeak

really? hmmm.

[FlyingNarwhal]

I don't see anything wrong with having a friends with benefits, fuck that "cheapens your worth" bullshit. I've never had a set in stone friends with benefits thing. I mean I guess kinda with one girl but it was more like an extended pre dating kinda thing with some sex that just never became more. Anyways go nuts with it, its always sounded like a fun idea to me.

I'm automatically jealous of whoever you choose, those pictures in the member photos thread are hot!

[sven]

You should to choose friends those give you more benefit in the life.

Best. Post. Ever. I so hope you are the real deal, and not a puppet or troll.

Anyway. This is a tough one. I had two friends who were more or less inseparable buddies. At social gatherings it was unthinkable to not see them together -- they were a package deal. Then both of them became single at the same time and they started sleeping together in that type of arrangement. It ruined their friendship for some reason.
I had a similar experience once with a woman I met on a dating site. We didn't fit together romantically but we enjoyed eachother's company. Then one night we got inubriated and one thing led to another. After that, she didn't want to see me any more. I've tried to guess why, but I don't really know.
This kind of stuff, its really hard to be logical about it. I think its difficult to avoid strange feelings from arising, or one party from getting too attached. I believe that the desire to procreate is the greatest force we carry within ourselves. It shouldn't be taken lightly.

[Tonus]

What do you all think about the concept of ‘friends with benefits?’

I don't see a problem with it as long as both parties are being honest with themselves. "It cheapens a person" or "I can't do it without developing feelings" are personal approaches and neither is inherently right or wrong, IMO. Better to know that up front than to deal with someone who insists that it's no problem and then opens up a box of drama on you all of a sudden.