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I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormon
#1
I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormon
Yeah, I know. Been just dying to read what happens between the Lamanites and Nephites or whatever the hell they are called.

On a recent visit to the Los Angeles area, we stayed in a hotel that had a copy of the BoM in the nightstand. Never one to miss an opportunity for comedy, I opened and randomly read bits to my GF and kids; to everyone's great amusement.

I then threw the BoM at my GF for sassin' me and forgot about it.

On arrival back home, what do I see in her suitcase? The infernal Book had followed us home! Like a mangy dog with three legs. Not even as cute; not by a long shot.

Now, my sweet GF gets to hear even more "And so it happened" and "And it came to pass" blah, blah and yada yada. Looks like 50-70% of every sentence starts with "And".

As Mark Twain said, "chloroform in print". Maybe he didn't see the humor in it. Damn straight-laced guy that he was.

Do you think it's a sign from The Ruling Council of Kolob? Perhaps my raving atheist of a GF has become a closet Mormon?

On reading excerpts, if truly a convert, I would expect her eye-rolling would tone down a bit though.

The funniest bit was probably in the beginning where there is a "certification" that the contents of the book were actually translated by old Joe, and they *swear* they ain't lying. No siree bob. We ain't! We swears it!

Uh huh.
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#2
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormom
(April 7, 2014 at 4:58 pm)JesusHChrist Wrote: As Mark Twain said, "chloroform in print".

That's a good one, must remember that Big Grin
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#3
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormom
Do you steal dog turds out of the park, too?

Angel
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#4
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormom
(April 7, 2014 at 5:24 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Do you steal dog turds out of the park, too?

Angel

Only when it gets on my shoe.
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#5
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormom
(April 7, 2014 at 4:58 pm)JesusHChrist Wrote: Yeah, I know. Been just dying to read what happens between the Lamanites and Nephites or whatever the hell they are called.

On a recent visit to the Los Angeles area, we stayed in a hotel that had a copy of the BoM in the nightstand.

Isn't the whole reason they put bibles and BoMs in hotel rooms because they want you to take them? I wouldn't feel bad about it. There's probably 50 more in their housekeeping closet, if not to replace the ones people take then to replace the ones people play Hide The Bible (or BoM) with and the housekeeper can't find it. :p


Quote:The funniest bit was probably in the beginning where there is a "certification" that the contents of the book were actually translated by old Joe, and they *swear* they ain't lying. No siree bob. We ain't! We swears it!

Uh huh.

Right, because NOBODY would lie about that!

Dodgy
Teenaged X-Files obsession + Bermuda Triangle episode + Self-led school research project = Atheist.
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#6
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormon
We were only half-joking about expecting to see a charge for $45 for the highly valued BoM.
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#7
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormon
You didn't have to take it. You can download an app and it will actually read it out loud for you. Yeah !!!!!!
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#8
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormon
Quote:As Mark Twain said, "chloroform in print".

It was Hitchens (I think) who accused Twain of shooting at too soft a target with that remark, as one of the books in the BoM is called 'Ether'.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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#9
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormon
I have always wanted to read the book of mormon, I have heard some of the stories in the book are pretty far out.
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#10
RE: I accidentally stole a copy of the Book of Mormon
http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/BOM/index.htm


Go for it.
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