My girlfriend got discriminated by some of her family

[MJ the Skeptical]

So I should probably set this up properly. My girlfriend (Sherry) and I are both atheists and both of our families know about it. Her family is more religious than mine so they naturally take more offense to religious discussion. For example, I've pretty much talked my mom out of her Sunday Christian beliefs and softened her position to that of an Agnostic but with Sherry's family most of them are mild or fundamentalist type.

Anyway, let's get to the meat of the story, the discrimination. Sherry is the youngest of a Brady Bunch-esque sized family, coming in at child #7. So she is an aunt and she absolutely loves to be around her 12 year old nephew Spencer who loves to talk about all the things she does; animals, space, anime, video games, etc. and just generally shootin' the shit. Anyway, she recently just talked to Spencer about religion which is where it all went downhill.

Even though Spencer has said to her he enjoys Sherry's company over that of his mother who is the 2nd oldest of Sherry's sisters, he supposedly ratted Sherry out and said he didn't like it. Even though Spencer was talking to her about it and didn't seem to not like the conversation as it was happening according to Sherry. So my guess is that he either was offended or he told his mother about the discussion in a non offensive way. Either way she dropped the hammer down and has basically said Sherry is a terrible person for trying to corrupt her son from their religious brainwashing.

So now, Sherry and her sister are at a point of almost disrepair and she treats Sherry poorly now. It's really sad to see once again religion putting up it's fake relationship of a story book character and it getting in the middle of real relationships. Sherry's sister has said that she may not want Spencer to see Sherry anymore just for expressing her opinions and not forcing anything. This news of discrimination really devastated Sherry to no end. I'm fully on her side on this one, even if just saying her opinion did offend him, what does the truth of Christianity have to hide from other belief systems or inquiry. Why the fuck can't Sherry express her beliefs if the question of beliefs gets brought up. Again, this was all shocking because Spencer seemed to like Sherry better than his own mother.

Anyway, no real reason I wrote this, just wanted to get it off my chest.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

Sorry, where's the 'discrimination' bit?

Boru

[MJ the Skeptical]

Sorry, where's the 'discrimination' bit?

Boru

Discrimination: The practice of unfairly treating a person or group of people differently from other people or groups of people. Her sister is treating her like shit (unfairly) for being an atheist (treating her differently from others) and not allowing son to see Sherry. What are you quibbling about? Thanks for showing your support for someone being a complete asshole. What word would you use anyway, this definition of discrimination fits. If you don't see this as discrimination or something similar, you're wrong.

Slayer (because people really need to read your name twice)

[RobbyPants]

Yeah, assuming Sherry just stated her opinion and didn't force anything, Spencer and his mom both need to grow the fuck up. Not everyone agrees with them, and they have to learn to live with that. So long as she isn't trying to deconvert him, there should be no problem here. She's not overstepping her bounds.

If her sister thinks that merely stating her opinion when asked is an act of "trying to corrupt her child", she should take a long, hard look at her religious beliefs and how fragile she feels they really are.

[popeyespappy]

Because a personal relationship with the dead Jew is more important than family...

[vorlon13]

And the family members practicing "fundamentalism lite" are all going to Hell anyhow, so you're going to have to put up with their crap in the afterlife too.

[Minimalist]

It's really sad to see once again religion putting up it's fake relationship of a story book character and it getting in the middle of real relationships.

That's what religion is for. Dig into it deeply enough and you'll probably find that Sherry touched one of her sister's dolls and she's still pissed about it. Using "religion" makes her seem less petty, in her own mind.

[archangle]

Sorry, where's the 'discrimination' bit?

Boru

anybody that questions what "someone" believes. Some day the leg humpers will understand that leg humping is independent of belief.

look at dogs.

[Minimalist]

Male dogs will try to hump other male dogs. It's about dominance.

And religion is pretty much the same thing.

[SteelCurtain]

So long as Sherry didn't actually overstep her bounds by trying to influence Spencer to be an atheist, I think the sister is way out of line. Even if she did overstep those bounds, writing her off forever is an extreme over-reaction. Whether there is a boundary there as far as teaching the kid about atheism or not is the sister's call, but the idea that even talking about atheism to a 12 year old being a mortal sin is past ridonkulous.

The only thing you can do is support Sherry through this time, and encourage dialogue between the two that is as far removed from high emotion as possible. Email is a great medium for that. You can spend a lot of time formulating what you want to say to a person while keeping their emotions and possible reactions in mind, so as to come to some sort of understanding and compromise rather than having a bare-knuckle brawl.