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RE: joke time
January 25, 2022 at 2:59 pm
"Sarge, I have a murder case here. A lady just shot her husband for stepping on a floor she had just mopped."
"Have you arrested her?"
"No. The floor's still wet."
Dying to live, living to die.
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RE: joke time
January 25, 2022 at 3:02 pm
(January 25, 2022 at 2:10 pm)Darinda Wrote: Went for a walk past a farm with my new girlfriend and we saw dogs mating.
She said: "How does the male know when the female is ready for sex?"
I replied: "He can smell she is ready. That's how nature works."
We then walked past a sheep field and the ram was mating the ewe.
Again my girlfriend asked: "How does the ram knew when the ewe is ready for sex?"
I replied: "It's nature. He can smell she is ready."
We then went past another pasture and the bull was mating with the cow.
My girlfriend said: "This is odd. They are really going at it. Surely the bull can't smell when she is ready?"
I said: "Oh, yes; it's nature. All animals can smell when the female is ready for sex."
Anyway, after the walk, I dropped her at home and kissed her *goodbye.*
She said: "Take care and get yourself tested for Covid-19."
Surprised, "Why do you say that?" I asked her.
She replied: *"You seem to have lost your sense of smell."
And here come the COVID jokes...
“If you are the smartest person in the room, then you are in the wrong room.” — Confucius
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RE: joke time
January 25, 2022 at 5:40 pm
(January 21, 2022 at 4:49 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: (January 21, 2022 at 4:35 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: My wife: 'I watched my first porn today.'
Me: 'Cool.'
My wife: 'I can't believe how young I was then.'
Me:
Boru
Did you have a small part in it?
😇😇😇
I was the merkin wrangler. The credits called me "Best Boy, Merkin".
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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RE: joke time
January 26, 2022 at 5:42 am
Women are hard to figure out. My wife told me she wanted to join a gym to get rid of her love handles. When I said she'd look funny with no ears, she went ballistic.
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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RE: joke time
January 26, 2022 at 1:37 pm
Starbucks is to start selling masks.
They're calling them coughy filters.
Dying to live, living to die.
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RE: joke time
January 26, 2022 at 1:51 pm
(January 26, 2022 at 1:37 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: Starbucks is to start selling masks.
They're calling them coughy filters.
No. Just…no.
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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RE: joke time
January 26, 2022 at 10:02 pm
I think Beccs' and Boru's relationship is being strained... Something's brewing.
(I'm here all week)
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Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
January 27, 2022 at 4:36 am
Mountains aren't just funny - they're hill areas.
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson