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RE: joke time
January 2, 2023 at 6:01 pm
(December 31, 2022 at 9:19 pm)Fireball Wrote: Chuck Norris has some notoriety as a martial artist, 'tis true. But he's still dumb as a bag of hammers.
True story.
When I was in high school, in 1973 (yeah, I may be an olde fart, but at least I've got some class, hence the "e" on "olde"), my Physics teacher had us to go outside to the quad, for a demonstration of leverage. My teacher arranged for a local (Long Beach, California) martial arts studio owner to come out and throw some football players around. The football players tried, but were completely outclassed by this guy. It was pretty instructive, and hilarious. (The football players didn't think much of it, afterwards.)
The studio owner's name?
Chuck Norris.
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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RE: joke time
January 2, 2023 at 6:09 pm
(January 2, 2023 at 6:01 pm)A. Secular Human Wrote: (December 31, 2022 at 9:19 pm)Fireball Wrote: Chuck Norris has some notoriety as a martial artist, 'tis true. But he's still dumb as a bag of hammers.
True story.
When I was in high school, in 1973 (yeah, I may be an olde fart, but at least I've got some class, hence the "e" on "olde"), my Physics teacher had us to go outside to the quad, for a demonstration of leverage. My teacher arranged for a local (Long Beach, California) martial arts studio owner to come out and throw some football players around. The football players tried, but were completely outclassed by this guy. It was pretty instructive, and hilarious. (The football players didn't think much of it, afterwards.)
The studio owner's name?
Chuck Norris. I graduated HS in '70. I'm old; no classy "e" for me.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
January 3, 2023 at 6:56 pm
What do Lord Voldemort and Andrew Tate have in common?
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
January 3, 2023 at 8:38 pm
(This post was last modified: January 3, 2023 at 8:40 pm by ignoramus.)
Don't you hate it when the buggers are knocking on your door early on a Sunday morning preaching to save you or you'll burn!
Stupid bloody firemen...
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
January 3, 2023 at 8:48 pm
(January 3, 2023 at 8:38 pm)ignoramus Wrote: Don't you hate it when the buggers are knocking on your door early on a Sunday morning preaching to save you or you'll burn!
Stupid bloody firemen...
A man goes to a fancy dress party wearing nothing but a glass jar on his penis.
A woman asks, "What are you supposed to be?"
"I'm a fireman," the man replies.
"But you're only wearing a jar!"
"In case of an emergency, break glass, pull the knob, and I'll come as quick as I can!"
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
January 3, 2023 at 9:59 pm
(This post was last modified: January 3, 2023 at 9:59 pm by Fireball.)
(January 3, 2023 at 8:48 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: (January 3, 2023 at 8:38 pm)ignoramus Wrote: Don't you hate it when the buggers are knocking on your door early on a Sunday morning preaching to save you or you'll burn!
Stupid bloody firemen...
A man goes to a fancy dress party wearing nothing but a glass jar on his penis.
A woman asks, "What are you supposed to be?"
"I'm a fireman," the man replies.
"But you're only wearing a jar!"
"In case of an emergency, break glass, pull the knob, and I'll come as quick as I can!" Not sure where I heard it, but blood is supposed to be a good lube.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
January 4, 2023 at 6:21 pm
(This post was last modified: January 4, 2023 at 6:22 pm by A. Secular Human.)
(January 3, 2023 at 9:59 pm)Fireball Wrote: (January 3, 2023 at 8:48 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: A man goes to a fancy dress party wearing nothing but a glass jar on his penis.
A woman asks, "What are you supposed to be?"
"I'm a fireman," the man replies.
"But you're only wearing a jar!"
"In case of an emergency, break glass, pull the knob, and I'll come as quick as I can!" Not sure where I heard it, but blood is supposed to be a good lube.
Probably some goddamn vampire.
Or was it a werewolf?
I forget.
Perhaps I'll ask Herschel Walker...he's an expert!
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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RE: joke time
January 4, 2023 at 9:53 pm
I hope Elon Musk never gets involved in a scandal.
Elongate would really be drawn out.
What fresh hell can this be? - Dorothy Parker
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RE: joke time
January 5, 2023 at 3:41 pm
What the difference between God and Maniac.
You can hang Maniac.
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RE: joke time
January 5, 2023 at 4:54 pm
Nancy Pelosi: Want to hear a joke?
Kevin McCarthy: Sure.
Pelosi: Speaker Of The House.
McCarthy: *pause* I don’t get it.
Pelosi: And you never will.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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