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Current time: December 15, 2024, 6:49 pm
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

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joke time
The Valkyrie Offline
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#4821
RE: joke time
April 19, 2021 at 5:36 am
(April 18, 2021 at 9:16 pm)A. Secular Human Wrote:
(April 18, 2021 at 4:48 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: Seeing my doctor.

"Beccs, pick a starsign."

"Ummm, okay.  Capricorn."

"I'm hardly going to tell you that you have Capricorn.  Pick another!"

It sure as hell isn't Virgo!

Or Pisces!

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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AniKoferBo Offline
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#4822
RE: joke time
April 19, 2021 at 5:27 pm
Someone told me that I'm condescending.

That means that I talk down to people.
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vulcanlogician Offline
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#4823
RE: joke time
April 19, 2021 at 5:31 pm
(April 19, 2021 at 5:27 pm)masoni Wrote: Someone told me that I'm condescending.

That means that I talk down to people.

Less discriminating minds mistake such a thing for arrogance.
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#4824
RE: joke time
April 19, 2021 at 5:55 pm
I thought I made a mistake once, but I was wrong.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
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Religious Views: Time to end them
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#4825
RE: joke time
April 19, 2021 at 6:00 pm
There's nothing funny about syphillis...

...unless your doctor has a lisp.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
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Religious Views: Time to end them
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#4826
RE: joke time
April 19, 2021 at 6:03 pm (This post was last modified: April 19, 2021 at 6:03 pm by The Valkyrie.)
An Asian guy walked into a pub and started drinking.

Iggy asked him, "Do you know kung-fu or any of that martial arts shit?"

The Asian guy responded, "Are you asking because of racial stereotype?"

Iggy replied, "No, I'm asking because that's my fucking drink!"

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#4827
RE: joke time
April 19, 2021 at 6:08 pm
(April 19, 2021 at 6:00 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: There's nothing funny about syphillis...

...unless your doctor has a lisp.

It was a cruel bastard who put an ‘s’ in the word ‘lisp’.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#4828
RE: joke time
April 20, 2021 at 5:51 am
Nurse *handing baby to the new father*: 'I'm so sorry, sir - your wife didn't make it.'

New father *handing baby back*: 'Don't be sorry, just bring me the one my wife made.'

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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vulcanlogician Offline
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#4829
RE: joke time
April 20, 2021 at 9:24 am
What do Chris Hemsworth and Mike Tyson have in common after a workout?


They're both Thor.
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Sal Offline
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#4830
RE: joke time
April 20, 2021 at 10:31 am
Once upon a time a young boy wanted a green tennis ball for his birthday, but he got a bicycle instead. Next year the boy wanted a green tennis ball, again, and again he got something different, this time a book on etiquette. On the 3rd birthday he still wanted a green tennis ball, but got some coloring pencils and a notebook to draw on. Each year, he wished for a green tennis ball, never getting a green tennis ball.

On his deathbed, surrounded by friends, family, children & grandchildren, and one of the grandchildren asked: "Why do you always want a green tennis ball for your birthday?" and he answered: "Oh, that's because ..." and then he died.
"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself — and you are the easiest person to fool." - Richard P. Feynman
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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

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