The Newly Departed thread: announcements (departures)

[Catholic_Lady]

He copied and pasted the report on the forums (or at least re typed the whole thing). I've never met him in person, but I've talked to him on Skype plenty of times and I can confidently say he definitely has it.

While I respect that you have interfaced with him on Skype and have seen him in action, so to speak, I'm still skeptical. And I must have missed the post with what was most assuredly a wall of words about it, because I tend to scroll past that kind of post, no matter who published it. I'm not here to diagnose anyone or to argue with religious people. The first I am not qualified for, and the second is a rat race I've engaged in enough times that I let other people take it on. It actually makes me sick to my stomach to be told that I'm broken, "can't see the elephant in the room", or how I'm going to hell for not believing in their particular schism of xtianity.

Top post, it's in hide tags if you are interested: https://atheistforums.org/thread-54039-page-5.html

[Fireball]

While I respect that you have interfaced with him on Skype and have seen him in action, so to speak, I'm still skeptical. And I must have missed the post with what was most assuredly a wall of words about it, because I tend to scroll past that kind of post, no matter who published it. I'm not here to diagnose anyone or to argue with religious people. The first I am not qualified for, and the second is a rat race I've engaged in enough times that I let other people take it on. It actually makes me sick to my stomach to be told that I'm broken, "can't see the elephant in the room", or how I'm going to hell for not believing in their particular schism of xtianity.

Top post, it's in hide tags if you are interested: https://atheistforums.org/thread-54039-page-5.html

Thanks, but I am not interested in reading about a medical diagnosis that should be personal and not published on the internet for all to see. I'll take your word for it and leave it at that.

[Joods]

Does it really matter? Hammy is a good guy. He’s not perfect but none of us are. If his posts really bother you, put him on ignore.

Agreed that his having autism makes no difference. I'm going to disagree with you on him being a good guy. You of all people should know how it feels to be on the receiving end of his bs so it really surprises me that you would take up for him like this knowing what he personally put you through. He was relentless across three threads in his hatred towards me.If he wanted people to think highly of him, he should have behaved better instead of going on a three day tirade about two posts that I made. 

This isn't his first go round with other members on this forum. We all know this. So maybe instead of looking to excuse away his behavior because he has X, someone can finally say that the 30 year old GROWN ADULT needs to just own his shit like everyone else has to. Last time I checked, bullying people while playing the sympathy card weren't praise-worthy characteristics.

[Little lunch]

I think we can accept that Hammy has Autism and it is difficult for him to see how his words may affect others, but not impossible, especially when issues arise and are pointed out to him.
That's when the trouble starts because, instead of owning his own shit, as Joods put it, he tries to wriggle out of the situation using his considerable intellect.
He is a nice guy, for sure, but he gets lost sometimes and appears quite mean, especially if he considers himself backed into a corner, but I don't think he means it.
Having said that, nobody has to put up with anything they don't want to from Hammy just because he has Autism.
That doesn't do anyone any good.
That's just my take on it, I'm no expert. :-)

[Losty]

Does it really matter? Hammy is a good guy. He’s not perfect but none of us are. If his posts really bother you, put him on ignore.

Until, like anyone, he gets mad and insults you, in which case you have every right to respond in kind.

Right, I’m not saying people don’t have a right to respond. I just find it weird talking about whether his autism affects how he posts or whatever. People can say whatever they want, I just don’t think it matters.

[J a c k]

My son is on the spectrum and hasn't once (that I know of) gone off the rails. If impulse control is the issue, that's one thing, and it can be improved. But being a cunt 'just because' is not acceptable.

How old is your son? Hammy didn’t always know about his diagnosis and by the time he was diagnosed he had never received intervention. There are skills that take time to be learned. Also, the spectrum is not so slim. Not everyone who’s on it will behave the same.

I don’t know about everyone else, but I will say one thing. Hammy might get a little ranty and become obnoxious at times, perhaps even erratic, but I have noticed that he does have to deal with certain people who really do seem to simply have it against him. Deep. It seems so personal sometimes. He gets taken down and then if he reacts it’s used against him. It’s like a loop that never stops. Not in all cases, but certainly in a lot of them. Those are my two cents.

Be well, hamz. From a friend to a friend: in every situation always stop to ask yourself, what can I learn from this and what can I do different. Forget what others do. Think about your own actions and then you’ll grow. After my divorce it could have been easy to sit back and own the victimization of it all, but I have chosen to accept my part (even if it wasn’t my fault) in order to have better results in future relationships. I hope you can reflect and grow. Love you, hun.

[Fireball]

My son is on the spectrum and hasn't once (that I know of) gone off the rails. If impulse control is the issue, that's one thing, and it can be improved. But being a cunt 'just because' is not acceptable.

How old is your son? Hammy didn’t always know about his diagnosis and by the time he was diagnosed he had never received intervention. There are skills that take time to be learned. Also, the spectrum is not so slim. Not everyone who’s on it will behave the same.

I don’t know about everyone else, but I will say one thing. Hammy might get a little ranty and become obnoxious at times, perhaps even erratic, but I have noticed that he does have to deal with certain people who really do seem to simply have it against him. Deep. It seems so personal sometimes. He gets taken down and then if he reacts it’s used against him. It’s like a loop that never stops. Not in all cases, but certainly in a lot of them. Those are my two cents.

Be well, hamz. From a friend to a friend: in every situation always stop to ask yourself, what can I learn from this and what can I do different. Forget what others do. Think about your own actions and then you’ll grow. After my divorce it could have been easy to sit back and own the victimization of it all, but I have chosen to accept my part (even if it wasn’t my fault) in order to have better results in future relationships. I hope you can reflect and grow. Love you, hun.

You are wise beyond your years.

[Edwardo Piet]

This contradicts what you said on the other thread! Bah. I don't like fakeness.

STFU, I didn't take you seriously in the other thread. I was being facetious. Just because you're having a freak out doesn't mean you should call me fake, disingenuous or say I'm jumping on a bandwagon. Just calm down, dude. You're being a drama queen. Own it.

I am calm although I recognize that I may not seem calm lol.

P.S. I had absolutely no idea you were being facetious. No wonder I got confused lol.

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Hammy is sensitive as hell. But very insensitive when it comes to others.

I'll agree with the latter but definitely not the former lol.

I SEEM senstiive as hell. Because I ACT sensitive as hell. Lol.

It may sound fake to act senstiive if I'm not sensitive. But if I don't know what senstiviity is even like how else am I supposed to cope..... by acting like a monotone robot? I've tried that and it works even less well lol. And since I struggle with balance...... fuck it. Besides, it's hardly a conscious decision: My whole personality has developed as someone who comes across as hyperemotional in order for me to function the way I am. And it's very easy to act overexcited when you have no sadness holding you back.... even if you don't actually feel overexcited..... so again, what's the alternative? Act like an emotionless robot? Nah, fuck that, I gotta function somehow.

I think EP was always jealous how I have this happy-go-lucky enthusiastic attitude that he was unable to sufficiently mirror. But that's another topic. He's a cunt and I'm not. There be the (VERY IMPORTANT) difference between me and EP.

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Just needs a little self-control and fewer excuses, coming from someone who's considered him a friend here. That said, there are people who instigate him whose behavior in that regard isn't much better.

I never understand the word "excuse" and how it supposedly differs from "explanation" besides subjectively biased personal connotations.

I can't comprehend the notion of a sincere excuse. And seen as I'm always sincere... I dunno what "excuse" directed at me is ever supposed to convey. It almost seems like the word "excuse" is used as an excuse to dismiss the actual motives behind my behavior

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That said, autism is not an excuse to accuse people of things or be rude.

I was the one accused.

And as for being rude... rudeness has been happening over AF by many since 2008. But it's only in more recent years that people have started whining about it.

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Blaming it on a diagnosis or getting special treatment because of it is not. No one gives me special treatment for my diagnoses, and I don't ask for it.

It seems to me like there are a few other posters who have wondered if they should treat me differently since my diagnosis. And I said they shouldn't treat me differently. (This is the irony here... it's only other people who seem to be making comments about treating me or not treating me differently now).

But it is rather ignorant, I think, for them to say basically "Should I treat Hammy as autistic or a normal person?"..... my response is.... treat Hammy like Hammy. Whatever weird autistic symptoms I have now... I've had for all the years people knew me BEFORE I was diagnosed as well (all the diagnosis really does for me is make me understand myself better and allow me to get the support I need in RL from my doctors et al)

So it literally makes zero sense to treat me any differently. Treat me as you've always treated me. If I got any 'extra sympathy' beforehand... I should get no more or less after my diagnosis.

[vulcanlogician]

For anyone who was worried about him, Kernel Sohcahtoa logged in on 5/3. So apparently he's okay.

[Edwardo Piet]

I'm glad he's okay.

He left, and this YouTuber who had been gone for several years returned. Coincidence?





Just kidding. It's a joke about how they have very similar voices.