Two ways to prove the existence of God. Also, what I'm looking for.

[IanHulett]

Attempting to prove a point

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The common way of proving god exists:

Hey guys. I'm going to prove God exists right now, using absolutely no facts or evidence to back up my claims, also using contradictory information from the bible that makes no bit of sense to make up for the fact that I have no facts, evidence or data.

First things first, when you look at guitars, you notice how they have 6 strings? Do you also notice how you take a guitar pick and strum the guitar, you make noise? Well, what does that have to do with God? Good question. I'll get there in a second.

Now, I'm going to teach you how to make Lasagna. Basically what you do is you take a flower seed and you plant it in soil and watch it grow. Then you run down the street screaming like a cat with its nuts cut off. Now, what does this have to do with god? Well, I'm going to get there in a second.

Now let me show you how to work an assault rifle to kill dem homos...

Leviticus 20:13 "IF A MAN LIE-ETH WITH A MAN KILL 'EM BECAUSE GAWD IS THE MOST SANE AND PERFECT BEING OF ALL TIME!

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The Logical way of proving God exists:

Hey guys. Ima prove to you god exists. Look around you. You can't see all this beauty and say god doesn't exist. I mean come on. Ebola? You can't use science to explain that. How about starvation of kids in Africa? The existence of Rapists, Pedophiles and serial killers? How about SIDS, and HIV/AIDS? If God didn't create them, then who did? Also, look at the wars done in his name. How about the fact that the human body is perfectly designed? For example, your food and windpipe being in the same place? What could go wrong? You can't possibly choke that way. You just can't. You can't look at these things and say God doesn't exist. It would be illogical to know about these things but still come to that conclusion.

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No offense to those who try to prove a God exists, but your approaches are highly unconvincing and nonsensical, much like what I wrote above. I can't simply look around, or take your bible/koran/torah verses as evidence, or use "logical" arguments of the existence of God. In order to prove God exists, you'd need to give me a coherent definition of God for starters, and second, IF you can coherently define god, I'd need something testable, like a fingerprint or DNA sample to evaluate your claim of his/her existence. Otherwise, I'm incapable of accepting the claim that a God exists. I sure hope this clears things up as far as what I'm looking for regarding the existence of God.

[Longhorn]

I think you have a point. I'll go praise Sheogorath

[Alex K]

Haha I like your first one!
And I guess Djent is blasphemous then

[Exian]

Lol Yeah, "getting there in a second" is a good sign of a swindler.

"What? You still need proof? Ok, I'll get to that in a second. But, first I need more time to convince you, so that by the time I get there, you'll already have the presupposition engrained."

[Nope]

I think you have a point. I'll go praise Sheogorath

"I once dug a pit and filled it with clouds....or was it clowns.... it doesn't matter, it didn't slow him down. But it really began to smell! Must have been clowns. Clouds don't smell, they taste of butter. And tears."

[Longhorn]

'Cheese for everyone! No wait, scratch that, cheese for no one. It can be as much of a celebration if you don't like cheese!'

[Salacious B. Crumb]

Or it's.. I don't need proof. I know I talk to the omnipotent, invisible purple dildo, and because I know these things, I'm still not able to prove it to you in any way, shape, or form.

[ignoramus]

I know for a fact that god will only be felt by those who can feel his presence!

[Longhorn]

I know for a fact that god will only be felt by those who can feel his presence!

Sounds vaguely sexual

[ignoramus]

I have not yet been touched by the hand of God!
But as a consolation prize, Christiano Ronaldo is in Melbourne at the moment!