How do you handle the bigots in your life?

[Mermaid]

My brother and his wife are right wing, tea-party type racists, so it's not an option to avoid them completely. I love them both very much, so it can be difficult. It takes a lot of diplomacy, and sometimes when push comes to shove, directness, to completely avoid any conversational territory that crosses into the danger zone. My brother seems to love to talk about it, and I often have to tell him to stop and why this is necessary.

[vorlon13]

When people start to aggravate me I imagine the soothing sounds of the woodchipper and visualize them going into it face first. 

Fargo . . .

[Salacious B. Crumb]

Good job Aroura on holding back. Yes, writing things out or telling someone else what happened is therapeutic. You could have actually made yourself look worse, although you would have been doing nothing wrong. I often do that on here, when arguing with dishonest people, but since there is a medium, some things really need to be said that aren't normally being said to people in person.

I've held in most of my feelings, most of my life, while dealing with bigots or wackos. Since, there's a 99% chance that they're never going to change anytime soon, the best thing to do is distance yourself from them. I finally have done that, and feel a sense of freedom. I realized that there were people in my life that were completely destroying it, they didn't care to change, so I had to change it myself. Many people can't see where the other person is coming from, or refuse to, so they try to justify themselves by telling someone else until someone else agrees with them. That's what would have happened while sending that rant out. I'm sure they would have justified their bigotry amongst themselves, and tried to make you look bad. Religion has been doing it forever, that's why I can't stand it. It poisons people's minds to think in a bigoted, judgmental way, and tells them that they are right no matter what. This also gives them the right to force others to believe what they believe, because "it's true".

Distance yourself from them as best as you can, and come to us if you need someone to talk to. You don't need that garbage in your life.

[KevinM1]

Facebook seems to cause far more problems than it is worth.

That's only because a lot of people don't know how to be smart with it.

My account is private.  I have like 65 friends total on there.  I'd say that 60 or so of them are people I know.  The others are people I know through mutual friends, and a couple people on here.  That's it.

And, yeah, some of them post stupid shit.  But Facebook gives you the ability to unfollow without unfriending, and neither unfollowing nor unfriending gives anyone a notification.  So, there are varying degrees of avoiding the bullshit altogether.

Drama often occurs because people throw friending around like candy at Halloween, but for some reason consider the 400+ people on their list actual close personal friends rather than the barely acquaintances they actually are.  So minor shit gets blown out of proportion.  On the flip side, some people seem nice on the surface, but are actually raging lunatics in real life.  Like my brother's wife.  So, unfriending them becomes an issue because people like that tend to monitor their friend list far more often than is healthy.

So, the solution is to be judicious with who you friend.  Just like IRL.

[BrokenQuill92]

Well let's see it really depends on what kind of bigot.

I'm not racist but… : I will attempt to explain why what you just said is racist.

Niggers!: If you come near me or mine, my boyfriend will find a nice well for your body.

Bi slut, whore, trysexual, can we have a threesome?: well guess who has no chance with this girl! And good job dividing the movement!

You're going to hell!: You're ugly!

Atheism is a religion.: Just like dudeism.

Your attempt to explain has failed. :-)

Sorry!

[Aroura]

Facebook seems to cause far more problems than it is worth.

That's only because a lot of people don't know how to be smart with it.

My account is private.  I have like 65 friends total on there.  I'd say that 60 or so of them are people I know.  The others are people I know through mutual friends, and a couple people on here.  That's it.

And, yeah, some of them post stupid shit.  But Facebook gives you the ability to unfollow without unfriending, and neither unfollowing nor unfriending gives anyone a notification.  So, there are varying degrees of avoiding the bullshit altogether.

Drama often occurs because people throw friending around like candy at Halloween, but for some reason consider the 400+ people on their list actual close personal friends rather than the barely acquaintances they actually are.  So minor shit gets blown out of proportion.  On the flip side, some people seem nice on the surface, but are actually raging lunatics in real life.  Like my brother's wife.  So, unfriending them becomes an issue because people like that tend to monitor their friend list far more often than is healthy.

So, the solution is to be judicious with who you friend.  Just like IRL.

I've noticed this a lot.  I have 48 friends on FB, most are my own or my husband's family (he has a fracking huge family).  A handful of old High school pals, and current friends.  I was using it for Girl scouts, but now that is done, I can go back to the privacy of close family and friends.

Almost everyone I know has way more friends than me...like HUNDREDS!  I bet most of them could not name 1/10th of the people in their "friends" list....

[BrokenQuill92]

I thought I'd fix this from earlier! Well let's see it really depends on what kind of bigot.

Racist bigot: I'm not racist but…/ My response: I will attempt to explain why what you just said is racist.

Dangerous and scary racist bigot: Niggers!/ My response: If you come near me or mine, my boyfriend will find a nice well for your body.

Gay bigots: Bi slut, whore, trysexual. Stupid straight men: can we have a threesome?/ My response: Well guess who has no chance with this girl! And good job dividing the movement!

Religious bigots: You're going to hell!/ My response:You're ugly!

Apologist bigot: Atheism is a religion./ My response: Just like dudeism.

[Losty]

Oh now I feel dumb for not getting it the first time.

[Losty]

I've noticed this a lot.  I have 48 friends on FB, most are my own or my husband's family (he has a fracking huge family).  A handful of old High school pals, and current friends.  I was using it for Girl scouts, but now that is done, I can go back to the privacy of close family and friends.

Almost everyone I know has way more friends than me...like HUNDREDS!  I bet most of them could not name 1/10th of the people in their "friends" list....

I have never met a single Facebook friend in person. Having family members and IRL acquaintances on Facebook makes my time on there unnecessarily miserable. I would much rather see Beccs naked and hit on some of my favorite forum members.

[BrokenQuill92]

Oh now I feel dumb for not getting it the first time.

It's okay Losty! Love you anyway!