Marriage Surnames

[Tiberius]

What are everyone's views on marriage surnames, i.e. which person takes the other person's name when getting married, or do you double-barrel or even invent an entirely new surname for both people?

I ask because once all my immigration stuff goes through, I'm planning on changing my surname to my wife's maiden name, for no particular reason other than I happen to like her surname more than my own, and I'm always a fan of breaking with tradition when there's no real reason for the tradition.

My wife's female cousin just got married to her wife, and they decided to take the wife's name. I guess it works the same for men marrying men? Either way, it would be interesting to know what people think, whether you know people who did non-traditional things with their surnames after marrying.

[Whateverist]

Not a big deal for me either way. However, I do regret that my wife still has her ex-husband's last name. Purely practical of course. She has a name and reputation as an artist under that name, why fuck with it? I'd say if you like her last name better go with it. Does Shell feel the same way, I mean, in liking it better?

[robvalue]

I told my wife I didn't expect her to take my name, but she wanted to anyway. I can see the convenience of having the same surname, although always taking the bloke's one as a matter of course makes no sense to me.

Everyone I know has done the standard deal, I think.

[Kingpin]

I guess tradition really, but no practical reason other than "that's how its been done". I can see in professional senses when a spouse has an established name as WTW's wife for example. My wife took my name, but I wouldn't have been offended if she decided to keep hers.

[Dystopia]

I don't see anything wrong with either method - In my country the tradition is for the wife to keep the spouse's name, but you can do as you please. I think the husband can take the name as well, but I'm not 100% certain. I'm indifferent to it but my girlfriend wants to keep my name if we ever get married. She's into a lot of traditionalist stuff. I don't mind it.

[Kitty Galore]

I like the idea of going with your wife's because you like it better. I see no issue with that. I think it's awesome!
As far as no reason that a wife always takes the husband's name as a tradition? There are a couple of reasons for that, imho.
I'm no expert on anything, but one is for the archaic purpose to show ownership in a weird way, from ages ago. (I'm only assuming here and could be talking out my ass)
The other reason, and I kind of go along with this one, is that family lines traditionally have followed by the males name. That is how we have traditionally tracked families and blood lines. Now that same sex marriage is legal I see this tradition changing over time. It has been for the male offspring to carry the name into the future. I think people of "importance" this is a big deal to them. The rest of us, meh.
I'm mostly commenting because in 1967, it was a big deal still. My mom was unwed and pregnant with me, a good fiend of hers offered to marry her to "give me a name". It was that important to him that she and I didn't carry that "Shame".

[c172]

My last name is a portmanteau of my biological parents surnames. I ammore of a fan of taking the male surname, but maybe having the female surname as a middle name. Secondary to that, I do like hyphenation. I jut don't like not having that family connection, so I don't like the portmanteau route.

The other extreme is a prep school soccer player in Pennsylvania back in the mid-'00s that had a double-hyphenated surname. I forget his name, but it would be like "Jake Fiorello-McCabe-Maxwell."

[robvalue]

I once thought about how cool it would be to change my name to Pyramid Head. It would have been interesting to see if it affected my job, which included answering calls from the public at the time.

[Tiberius]

Not a big deal for me either way. However, I do regret that my wife still has her ex-husband's last name. Purely practical of course. She has a name and reputation as an artist under that name, why fuck with it? I'd say if you like her last name better go with it. Does Shell feel the same way, I mean, in liking it better?

Shell doesn't mind either way. She also currently has her ex-husbands last name, but she writes under her maiden name. If you regret that your wife still has her ex-husbands name, why don't you suggest she change her last name officially, but use her old name as a pseudonym when doing her art?

[Minimalist]

George Carlin did a bit on this where he said "Pick a name!"

You have.

George will be happy.

 


(or would be if he wasn't dead.)