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RE: Three Questions for God
April 19, 2016 at 2:07 am
(This post was last modified: April 19, 2016 at 2:08 am by ignoramus.)
Under construction till I get home.
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 19, 2016 at 9:48 am
1. ALS? I mean...really dude?!
2. Is it just your "essence" that is male, or do you actually have a penis? (Oh, please. I'm not interested. It's just morbid curiosity! Get over yourself, God)
3. If you could snap your fingers and make me a cup size or two larger that'd be great, K.Thanks.
... God grants wishes right?!
Nay_Sayer: “Nothing is impossible if you dream big enough, or in this case, nothing is impossible if you use a barrel of KY Jelly and a miniature horse.”
Wiser words were never spoken.
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 20, 2016 at 5:22 am
Sorry LFC, I think you're confusing God with a garden variety genie...
I certainly hope he doesn't grant wishes!
(Unless there's millions of kids wishing for nothing more than to die a painful death from malnutrition.)
In which case, get those big bewbies happening!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 20, 2016 at 6:27 am
I think your wish did come true, but it came true for me. Whoops.
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 21, 2016 at 9:45 am
(April 18, 2016 at 9:41 am)Time Traveler Wrote: The Judeo-Christian God finally reveals himself to everyone on the planet, convincing you and every adherent of all other “false” religions beyond any doubt that he, Yahweh, is indeed real. He offers you a chance to ask three questions without fear of reprisal. What would you ask?
My questions would be…
1) You remained hidden for so long. Did you wait to reveal yourself until now because the religious wars between Islam and Christianity, Protestant and Catholic, etc., amused you?
2) So, are the Catholics right in accepting evolution, or did you plant false evidence as the young earth creationists attest?
3) And what were you thinking when you made the esophagus and windpipe so close together? I nearly choked on my beer when I found out you were real!
Not that I speak for God, but I'd think from what I have observed with similarly asked questions in the bible his answers may go something like:
1)I'm in plain sight, you just have your eyes closed to me.
1a) I'm not found in 'religion' Religion is a tool people use to 'sift' themselves.
2)None are 'right,' only sure of themselves.
3)Did you notice that I did not put gaurd rails and safty net on mountains, or trees? It's to thin the herd of d-bags who do stupid things or who have yet to figure our to stop breathing while they swallow.
And for Rocket #3 was just a joke don't get all huffy and say 'drich is just making crap up God never said...'
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 21, 2016 at 10:04 am
Which god are you?
Is there a holy book that accurately describes what you are as an individual?
How am I supposed to know it when I see it?
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 21, 2016 at 10:56 am
I forgot this one, can I have another:
"Why should you interest me?"
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 21, 2016 at 10:59 am
(April 21, 2016 at 10:56 am)robvalue Wrote: I forgot this one, can I have another:
"Why should you interest me?"
"What do you get out of the whole thing?"
"I was thirsty for everything, but blood wasn't my style" - Live, "Voodoo Lady"
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 21, 2016 at 11:05 am
Haha yeah!
"Haven't you heard of Xbox?"
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 21, 2016 at 2:32 pm
(April 18, 2016 at 9:41 am)Time Traveler Wrote: The Judeo-Christian God finally reveals himself to everyone on the planet, convincing you and every adherent of all other “false” religions beyond any doubt that he, Yahweh, is indeed real. He offers you a chance to ask three questions without fear of reprisal. What would you ask?
My questions would be…
1) You remained hidden for so long. Did you wait to reveal yourself until now because the religious wars between Islam and Christianity, Protestant and Catholic, etc., amused you?
2) So, are the Catholics right in accepting evolution, or did you plant false evidence as the young earth creationists attest?
3) And what were you thinking when you made the esophagus and windpipe so close together? I nearly choked on my beer when I found out you were real!
(April 21, 2016 at 9:45 am)Drich Wrote: Not that I speak for God, but I'd think from what I have observed with similarly asked questions in the bible his answers may go something like:
1)I'm in plain sight, you just have your eyes closed to me.
1a) I'm not found in 'religion' Religion is a tool people use to 'sift' themselves. Okay, I'll play...
1) Actually, my eyes are open, and I don't see you O' Lord. Are you saying you are indeed visible between about 390 to 700nm on the electromagnetic spectrum which is the typical range detectable by human eyes? Or are you speaking in abstruse, meaningless metaphors again?
1a) So, let me rephrase... why wait to reveal yourself when doing so sooner could have ended numerous deaths in which people 'sifted' themselves based upon their understanding of your abstruse, meaningless metaphors?
(April 21, 2016 at 9:45 am)Drich Wrote: 2)None are 'right,' only sure of themselves. One might consider this a dodge of the question, but certainly you would never do such a thing, O Almighty One! So, given that none of these people are 'right', please explain what is the right way to think about evolution?
(April 21, 2016 at 9:45 am)Drich Wrote: 3)Did you notice that I did not put gaurd rails and safty net on mountains, or trees? It's to thin the herd of d-bags who do stupid things or who have yet to figure our to stop breathing while they swallow. I thought your style was to wipe everyone out with global floods in order to thin the herd, save for a handful of ark-building zookeepers.
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