Posts: 480
Threads: 126
Joined: June 25, 2017
Reputation:
9
My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:01 am
(This post was last modified: September 16, 2017 at 9:03 am by Der/die AtheistIn.)
He called me today so we can speak. He told me many things about what I should and shouldn't do later in life. At some point, he told me that my future husband must be christian, it doesn't matter the denomination.
This is hypocrisy, my dad doesn't believe in Hell, and he told me years ago that other religions aren't worse than ours.
I'm in the closet atheist, and I would prefer to marry a nonebeliever like me. Yes, two persons with different religions, or a religios and a nonreligious person can get married and be happy, but I do think that atheism is right. I see other beliefs as wrong, and I don't claim otherwise, so I'm not a hypocrite, unlike my dad.
Dad insists so much sometimes about me marrying a man, I'm lucky I'm not a lesbian. I'm pretty sure he would accept me, or at the very least tolerate me if I was asexual and/or aromantic, since society doesn't usually discriminate against those kind of people, not in Europe at the very least. The thing is, I'm not entirely sure about my sexuality. I never had a crush, not a serious one at the very least, but I do feel some kind of attraction towards males, I'm not sure about girls, though. I've had fantasies about being with both boys and girls, I didn't ask for those fantasies, they sympli happened. The idea of dating an intersex person doesn't disgust me. Also, I don't know if I would like dating a transgender or non-binary person, I don't have anything against them, I sympli don't know if I am romantically or sexually attracted to them. I don't know if I'm bisexual, bi-curious, pansexual, or something else.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in God, in none"
Charlie Chaplin
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation:
111
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:21 am
Identifying as something is one thing... Not knowing what you're attracted to by now is unusual (to me)... What do your hormones say?
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Posts: 480
Threads: 126
Joined: June 25, 2017
Reputation:
9
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:28 am
(September 16, 2017 at 9:21 am)ignoramus Wrote: Identifying as something is one thing... Not knowing what you're attracted to by now is unusual (to me)... What do your hormones say?
My hormones say that a boy would be a great partner, I don't know if I'm attracted to girls or just curious, and I don't know about transgenders and non-binary.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in God, in none"
Charlie Chaplin
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation:
111
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:31 am
Yep. No prob.
Try to find someone that YOU like, not have them picked for you... Not so easy in some countries, I know.
Good luck.
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Posts: 7392
Threads: 53
Joined: January 15, 2015
Reputation:
88
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:36 am
It's possible that you asexual, or even romantic asexual. Or pansexual. Or it might change over time. Either way your dad has no say about who you marry or fall in love with. What's important is that you find happiness and find the right person for you.
Posts: 480
Threads: 126
Joined: June 25, 2017
Reputation:
9
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:38 am
(September 16, 2017 at 9:31 am)ignoramus Wrote: Yep. No prob.
Try to find someone that YOU like, not have them picked for you... Not so easy in some countries, I know.
Good luck.
Thank you! I live in Romania Europe, I will move to Vienna. There it wouldn't be so hard to pick someone I like.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in God, in none"
Charlie Chaplin
Posts: 15452
Threads: 147
Joined: June 15, 2015
Reputation:
88
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:39 am
(September 16, 2017 at 9:01 am)Die Atheistin Wrote: He called me today so we can speak. He told me many things about what I should and shouldn't do later in life. At some point, he told me that my future husband must be christian, it doesn't matter the denomination.
This is hypocrisy, my dad doesn't believe in Hell, and he told me years ago that other religions aren't worse than ours.
I'm in the closet atheist, and I would prefer to marry a nonebeliever like me. Yes, two persons with different religions, or a religios and a nonreligious person can get married and be happy, but I do think that atheism is right. I see other beliefs as wrong, and I don't claim otherwise, so I'm not a hypocrite, unlike my dad.
Dad insists so much sometimes about me marrying a man, I'm lucky I'm not a lesbian. I'm pretty sure he would accept me, or at the very least tolerate me if I was asexual and/or aromantic, since society doesn't usually discriminate against those kind of people, not in Europe at the very least. The thing is, I'm not entirely sure about my sexuality. I never had a crush, not a serious one at the very least, but I do feel some kind of attraction towards males, I'm not sure about girls, though. I've had fantasies about being with both boys and girls, I didn't ask for those fantasies, they sympli happened. The idea of dating an intersex person doesn't disgust me. Also, I don't know if I would like dating a transgender or non-binary person, I don't have anything against them, I sympli don't know if I am romantically or sexually attracted to them. I don't know if I'm bisexual, bi-curious, pansexual, or something else.
Sounds like asexual to me to be honest.
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
-walsh
Posts: 480
Threads: 126
Joined: June 25, 2017
Reputation:
9
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:45 am
(September 16, 2017 at 9:39 am)Catholic_Lady Wrote: (September 16, 2017 at 9:01 am)Die Atheistin Wrote: He called me today so we can speak. He told me many things about what I should and shouldn't do later in life. At some point, he told me that my future husband must be christian, it doesn't matter the denomination.
This is hypocrisy, my dad doesn't believe in Hell, and he told me years ago that other religions aren't worse than ours.
I'm in the closet atheist, and I would prefer to marry a nonebeliever like me. Yes, two persons with different religions, or a religios and a nonreligious person can get married and be happy, but I do think that atheism is right. I see other beliefs as wrong, and I don't claim otherwise, so I'm not a hypocrite, unlike my dad.
Dad insists so much sometimes about me marrying a man, I'm lucky I'm not a lesbian. I'm pretty sure he would accept me, or at the very least tolerate me if I was asexual and/or aromantic, since society doesn't usually discriminate against those kind of people, not in Europe at the very least. The thing is, I'm not entirely sure about my sexuality. I never had a crush, not a serious one at the very least, but I do feel some kind of attraction towards males, I'm not sure about girls, though. I've had fantasies about being with both boys and girls, I didn't ask for those fantasies, they sympli happened. The idea of dating an intersex person doesn't disgust me. Also, I don't know if I would like dating a transgender or non-binary person, I don't have anything against them, I sympli don't know if I am romantically or sexually attracted to them. I don't know if I'm bisexual, bi-curious, pansexual, or something else.
Sounds like asexual to me to be honest.
I didn't say that I'm not sexually attracted to anybody, I said that if I were I wouldn't be discriminated against. I do feel sexually attracted to boys, but I don't know about girls or other identities.
"By simple common sense I don't believe in God, in none"
Charlie Chaplin
Posts: 27203
Threads: 519
Joined: June 16, 2015
Reputation:
90
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 9:48 am
Religion has always been a minor concern for me when selecting a mate. There are so many other things to consider.
But then I've never been attracted to one with bat shit crazy religious tendencies. Is that my own personal natural selection at work?
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
Posts: 23918
Threads: 300
Joined: June 25, 2011
Reputation:
151
RE: My dad wants me to marry another christian
September 16, 2017 at 10:14 am
I've been with two women who, unless they were shitting me, hadn't experienced orgasms. I believe some number of women manage to grow up without ever discovering this capacity of their body. Seems weird to a guy. So, if you are such a woman, rather than worry about who or what you are, I'd advise you to simply experiment with pleasure. Take matters into your own hands and see where it goes.
But probably I am way off base. More importantly, depending on how dependent you are with your parents, I'd thank them for their concern but insist that they not worry about what is really your business.
|
