Homophobia. A misleading label

[Dotard]

Imagine if you will that any time the discussion over guns came up or this guy was in the same room with a gun, he began without being asked to express deep anxiety over being shot and wanted to get away from the gun. I would call that an disproportionate or inappropriate fear of guns.

There's the differance. '..express deep anxiety..' I'm talking about folks, like me, where there is only a discomfort, not 'deep anxiety'.

Even the second example, with his frothing diatribe over how he "doesn't swing that way" when nobody propositioned him or asked him, demonstrates an inappropriate fear.

'...frothing diatribe..' I am not speaking of such overt, properly classified, homophobia.

Phobias come in varying degrees of intensity but what distinguishes them from appropriate fears is on how real the danger is. If a gay man is stalking you, it's appropriate to fear for your safety. If you just happen to be in the presence of a gay man, it's not appropriate to have feelings of anxiety. I'm not sure what you mean by "uncomfortable" but that may be just a mild anxiety and therefore, at best, a mild phobia.

What distinguishes a phobia from mere dislike is an intense or extreme emotional reation. If a woman has a discomfort being in a room of men would you say she is menophobic with all the a priori presuppositions relating to motives?

Perhaps you could elaborate?

If you took a wrong turn into a unfamiliar neighborhood and saw what appeared to be gangs on the corners, broken down stripped cars, hobos around burning cans, would you not feel uncomfortable? Not really 'scared' cause you're all Steven Segal badass or something, just 'uncomfortable' and would prefer not to be in that neighborhood?

Ever been in a social situation (some kinda gathering, I don't know) and you realize ou have like zero in common with anyone there, don't really know anyone, would not that bored, 'antsie', wanting to leave feeling be called 'uncomfortable'? It's like if you ended up in a startrek convention and you absolutly do not like startrek, you're uncomfortable there, you don't have a "phobia" of startrek of any kind, not een a 'mild phobia'.

I don't know how else to explain it. [/quote]

[Violet]

when you know perfectly well that the best sex is with women (with a vagina of course). And we're not talking fat ones.

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Are you talking from experience sae

Coz fat girls can be soooo eager to please, (if memory serves me)

I didn't say *I* knew perfectly well that the best sex is with women. I said that Dotard knows it perfectly well.

I've tried, and I can't easily imagine sex without someone else having a penis. Hopefully this will change once my transformation is complete.

I have had experience with fat men though. Really fucking fat. It is not fun. Not even a little bit. Maybe if I was fatter myself, I wouldn't mind it so much... but I'm positively tiny compared to giants like that. And funnily enough, I want to be smaller. Nearly a foot shorter, with dimensions decreasing all around. How I envy people that are both short and good looking

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Homophobia has become the widely accepted term, and it is generally understood it dosen't mean an actual fear, words I feel can separate completely from their root words and come to mean something very different as long as it is widely understood. So call it what you will but I hope you can over come this (to me) stupid position you have.

Sure, words change in meaning all the time. Doesn't make you sound like any less of an asshole when you say 'phobia' and don't mean it.

[chasm]

How I envy people that are both short and good looking

I'm short but not good looking. Do you want to trade me shortness for good looks, hmm hmm?

P.S. HI!

[Violet]

No you seem to be ignoring those very important discriptors in the definition of 'Hate'. Intensely Passionately Extreme . While I do harbor a dislike and adversion in no way are they passionate, intense or exteme.

Its an implied part of the word, but it isn't always intended to mean such.

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How I envy people that are both short and good looking

I'm short but not good looking. Do you want to trade me shortness for good looks, hmm hmm?

P.S. HI!

Only I'm not good looking, despite what some people have suggested I'd wholly trade you bodies, then you could enjoy this in my place.

[Autumnlicious]

I assume you're either from a different country or different era. Same goes to original poster, get over it man, your clear disliking of homosexuals for no reason other than that they are homosexual is exactly what homophobia is, dissect the word as much as you like and try and convince yourself you're not as much as you like but it's a horrible prejudice regardless of what you want to label it.

Up yours. I also used to be afraid of the water. I must be from a different era. I also used to be afraid of strangers. I must be from a different era.

Did I fucking say it was fucking reasonable? No. So fuck you and your psychobabble.

[Violet]

I am still afraid of insects. And rodents. And spiders. And anything else you might call 'creepy crawlies'. Beetles, dragonflies, wasps, and bees are the worst. I am terrified of them.

I think I'm still American and modern though.

[DeistPaladin]

There's the differance. '..express deep anxiety..'

We're talking about his homophobia, not yours. You're trying to say he only has "rape anxiety from gay men" not fear of gay men. This is like saying he's not afraid of guns, he's afraid of being shot. Distinction without a difference.

I'm talking about folks, like me, where there is only a discomfort, not 'deep anxiety'.

So you have a mild case of homophobia, then?

What distinguishes a phobia from mere dislike is an intense or extreme emotional reation. If a woman has a discomfort being in a room of men would you say she is menophobic with all the a priori presuppositions relating to motives?

I think the term would be "androphobic" and, yes, if she has an unexplainable discomfort being around men, this is a problem she should speak with a therapist about.

If you took a wrong turn into a unfamiliar neighborhood and saw what appeared to be gangs on the corners, broken down stripped cars, hobos around burning cans, would you not feel uncomfortable? Not really 'scared' cause you're all Steven Segal badass or something, just 'uncomfortable' and would prefer not to be in that neighborhood?

Again, you're talking about a real hazard here. If you see being around gay men in such a way that this is an appropriate analogy, we're talking about a more extreme reaction.

Ever been in a social situation (some kinda gathering, I don't know) and you realize ou have like zero in common with anyone there, don't really know anyone, would not that bored, 'antsie', wanting to leave feeling be called 'uncomfortable'? It's like if you ended up in a startrek convention and you absolutly do not like startrek, you're uncomfortable there, you don't have a "phobia" of startrek of any kind, not een a 'mild phobia'.

Bored =/= uncomfortable or uneasy.

[fr0d0]

Dotard - do you think your peer group has an influence on your attitude? Just saying as that's what I think caused the same reaction in me. That wasn't me and I learned to assimilate the new information. Maybe it is you or it's by now very deeply ingrained.

[Skipper]

I assume you're either from a different country or different era. Same goes to original poster, get over it man, your clear disliking of homosexuals for no reason other than that they are homosexual is exactly what homophobia is, dissect the word as much as you like and try and convince yourself you're not as much as you like but it's a horrible prejudice regardless of what you want to label it.

Up yours asshole. I also used to be afraid of the water. I must be from a different era. I also used to be afraid of strangers. I must be from a different era.

Did I fucking say it was fucking reasonable? No. So fuck you and your psychobabble.

Piss off. Being afraid of water and strangers are reasonable fears due to their possible dangers. How is a persons sexual preference ever a danger to you? Do you feel any more or less secure or safe in yourself around a heterosexual? So why should you feel any different around a homosexual?

Maybe not from a different era, but certainly from a different country.

[LastPoet]

Boys, behave!

Dotard, observing your argumentation along this thread, it all looks you are doing apologetics for homophobia. So many rationalizations only avoid the problem, and IMO worsen, since I think homophobia is a bad thing. Rationalize into the problem, not out of it.