Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: November 18, 2024, 5:29 pm

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
#71
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
(November 4, 2017 at 3:09 pm)Neo-Scholastic Wrote: What's to be frightened of? When I was an atheist it felt like a burden had been lifted...initially at least.

Fear makes no sense. Emptiness does. No magical skydaddy to pray to, no magical heaven to go to Tongue

Just transient pleasures and transient pains and trying to care about others Tongue
Reply
#72
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
(November 4, 2017 at 3:03 am)Odoital77 Wrote:
(November 3, 2017 at 12:47 am)
Quote:Rayden_Greywolf Wrote: So, I've been denying my atheism for years, but man, I just can't do it anymore. That said, there's a reason I've been avoiding it. I'm terrified right now. I don't get how anyone's supposed to be happy like this.

I feel like...all I can do is cope with life now. I don't see what there is to look forward to, or to take reassurance in. Everything just seems empty.

(Why yes, I'm on meds and seeing a counselor. Doesn't help much.)

Your feeling is entirely appropriate.  On atheism there is no grounds for having hope.  You simply have the life you appear to have now, and when it is over...you are over.  Nothing that you say, do, or feel has any ultimate meaning or significance.  If I somehow found myself an atheist, I can imagine myself feeling much the same way.  Knowing myself, I would likely end up killing myself through destructive addictive behavior, probably by way of the abuse of alcohol and use of prostitutes.  Thankfully, I'm free from that kind of existence as a Christian.  I would invite you to reconsider the truth of theism and Christianity in particular.

Predatory christer recruiting tactics at their most vile.

Everyone take a good look. Most aren't as lacking in subtlety as this specimen.
Thief and assassin for hire. Member in good standing of the Rogues Guild.
Reply
#73
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
It would appear, Rayden, that you are suffering from fairly severe clinical depression, and this is a "pre-existing" condition.

However, there is something going on that likely is separate from depression, and that is your looking at life and not being particularly impressed with it. In other words it's not a rational proposition that you would have signed on for in some contrived situation where you had it laid out for you in advance and were able to choose to experience your life, or not.

Some people are just blessed with "happy juice" / optimism and can't help but find life a trip. I am constitutionally incapable of it. Yet I am not clinically depressed, and never have been. I'm just not easily amused.

In my particular case this comes from being, by nature, an idealist. I see what I fancy life could / should / would be, but isn't, and I go, "meh".

I have had to work pretty hard on the realization that it falls to us to flex with / adapt to life, not the other way around. Idealism is basically insisting that life accommodate me, when in fact, life just IS. That I don't find it impressive or pleasurable isn't personal, and so I get to choose whether to suffer to to learn to be flexible.

In my experience it really does just come down to that. Life isn't purpose-built for either of us, it's merely a situation we find ourselves in.

Empirical observation demonstrates that people can and do find meaning, purpose, and even joy in life. Our job is to figure out how to hack our way into better mental states than we'd naturally experience without exerting any effort at all to modify our thinking.

So lesson #1 here is, tell yourself over and over again until you start to understand that it's true (because it is): LIFE ISN'T PERSONAL. This means both that you're not being picked on, and that it's not designed to your personal specifications, and you haven't got some sort of right to demand that it reform itself.

Lesson #2 is to avoid what I call "scope creep" (borrowing here from software engineering). Live within your true scope, which is, a mortal, finite, imperfect, and not at all important creature. This has the downside that you don't get to stroke your own ego in various ways but the distinct upside that it relieves you of a SHIT TON of responsibility. You don't have to impress everyone or save the world to be a success. You just have to be yourself.

Figure out who "yourself" is and start being true to that.

That's for starters.

If you're willing to embrace these basic ideas and undo your operant conditioning to the contrary (some of it enabled by religion, some not so much) then you're on your way to a better state of being.

I'm the furthest thing from a Pollyanna ... I just came to these realizations by a very arduous process that so far has taken me six decades. I'm trying to save you some time.

Hope this helps.

And for dog's sake, no one wants you to leave or asked you to do so or said that sharing your feelings was inappropriate. All that was said is we aren't qualified to treat depression and you should seek help for that. Apart from that, we're here for you.

(November 4, 2017 at 3:45 pm)Hammy Wrote:
(November 4, 2017 at 3:09 pm)Neo-Scholastic Wrote: What's to be frightened of? When I was an atheist it felt like a burden had been lifted...initially at least.

Fear makes no sense. Emptiness does. No magical skydaddy to pray to, no magical heaven to go to Tongue

Just transient pleasures and transient pains and trying to care about others Tongue
Yes, "this too shall pass" is a great comfort if you let it be.

(November 4, 2017 at 3:54 pm)The Gentleman Bastard Wrote: Predatory christer recruiting tactics at their most vile.

Everyone take a good look. Most aren't as lacking in subtlety as this specimen.
Maybe, but I'm more than willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. He didn't do a drive-by posting, and he's engaging in a reasonable manner so far.

If that changes, fine ... in the meantime there's nothing to be threatened by.
Reply
#74
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
Quote:What's to be frightened of  When I was an atheist  it felt like a burden had been lifted...initially at least.

From any description you have given you were a terrible irrational atheist .Who ran screaming back to religion you hit a hurdle instead of working out .

We can only hope our friend here has greater resolve
Seek strength, not to be greater than my brother, but to fight my greatest enemy -- myself.

Inuit Proverb

Reply
#75
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
(November 4, 2017 at 3:57 pm)mordant Wrote: Maybe, but I'm more than willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. He didn't do a drive-by posting, and he's engaging in a reasonable manner so far.

If that changes, fine ... in the meantime there's nothing to be threatened by.

Telling someone that in their shoes they'd become sociopathic and the only answer is jeebus is reasonable?!?

Threatened? No. Try disgusted.
Thief and assassin for hire. Member in good standing of the Rogues Guild.
Reply
#76
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
(November 3, 2017 at 10:11 am)Aroura Wrote: This forum really is filled with a lot of insensitive assholes. Come on guys, someone's suffering and your advice is, stop suffering? Buck up. Get over yourself?
Not all, but there are a lot of outright mean responses here.

No, I want to know exactly why he/she is suffering. Nothing has really changed in this person's life at all bar a superstition has been deleted. I simply cannot fathom such a thought. I was raised RCC. When I tossed that baloney in the great bit bucket recycle bin, did I suddenly find life had no meaning? No. Did I suddenly find I had to glumly go through the motions of the sheer pointlessness of life? No.  

Why on Earth would anyone feel that way?

There must be some other underlying motive here. Bullying? Rejection by family and peers, perhaps? I don't know. And thus the question.

Frankly, my eldest came out as trans-gender recently after having previously come out as atheist. Given the rump of remaining RCC loons, one can imagine the mayhem.

And I had no hand act or part in that. My policy was "step away, do not get dragged into the fight, provide support". I still got blamed for it, being as I am a godless heathen and spawn of the devil.

Bottom line is, our OP has some other thing going on or is a wind up merchant IMHO.
Reply
#77
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
(November 4, 2017 at 5:41 am)Odoital77 Wrote: No, as I said earlier.  "On atheism there is no grounds for having hope.  You simply have the life you appear to have now, and when it is over...you are over.  Nothing that you say, do, or feel has any ultimate meaning or significance.  If I somehow found myself an atheist, I can imagine myself feeling much the same way.  Knowing myself, I would likely end up killing myself through destructive addictive behavior, probably by way of the abuse of alcohol and use of prostitutes.  Thankfully, I'm free from that kind of existence as a Christian.  I would invite you to reconsider the truth of theism and Christianity in particular."


You know...I think I just might consider your proposition. I too, am entirely too lazy to come up with my own meaning and significance. Additionally, I'm too f*cking greedy to accept that any goodness or meaning that I might in this life find can't last forever and ever and ever. And ever.

Pray for me, friend. Pray for me to come to recognize that if I can imagine it, and really, really want it....then surely it must be so.

'Cause the thought of slowly killing myself via death by whore is just unbearable to me.
Reply
#78
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
(November 4, 2017 at 4:37 pm)Abaddon_ire Wrote:
(November 3, 2017 at 10:11 am)Aroura Wrote: This forum really is filled with a lot of insensitive assholes. Come on guys, someone's suffering and your advice is, stop suffering? Buck up. Get over yourself?
Not all, but there are a lot of outright mean responses here.

No, I want to know exactly why he/she is suffering. Nothing has really changed in this person's life at all bar a superstition has been deleted. I simply cannot fathom such a thought. I was raised RCC. When I tossed that baloney in the great bit bucket recycle bin, did I suddenly find life had no meaning? No. Did I suddenly find I had to glumly go through the motions of the sheer pointlessness of life? No.  

Why on Earth would anyone feel that way?

There must be some other underlying motive here. Bullying? Rejection by family and peers, perhaps? I don't know. And thus the question.

Frankly, my eldest came out as trans-gender recently after having previously come out as atheist. Given the rump of remaining RCC loons, one can imagine the mayhem.

And I had no hand act or part in that. My policy was "step away, do not get dragged into the fight, provide support". I still got blamed for it, being as I am a godless heathen and spawn of the devil.

Bottom line is, our OP has some other thing going on or is a wind up merchant IMHO.
So, just because it didn't happen to you, there must be more to his story or else he's full of shit?

Seriously, I need a break from people. This guy came looking for someone to talk to, just talk, and you asshats tell him we aren't qualified and question his sanity.

I'm done here for a while.
“Eternity is a terrible thought. I mean, where's it going to end?” 
― Tom StoppardRosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead
Reply
#79
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
(November 4, 2017 at 4:46 pm)Thena323 Wrote: 'Cause the thought of slowly killing myself via death by whore is just unbearable to me.

Sounds like paradise to me!
Reply
#80
RE: New atheist here, gotta say, not loving it
(November 3, 2017 at 12:47 am)Rayden_Greywolf Wrote: So, I've been denying my atheism for years, but man, I just can't do it anymore. That said, there's a reason I've been avoiding it. I'm terrified right now. I don't get how anyone's supposed to be happy like this.

I feel like...all I can do is cope with life now. I don't see what there is to look forward to, or to take reassurance in. Everything just seems empty.

(Why yes, I'm on meds and seeing a counselor. Doesn't help much.)


If you still follow this thread I would like to give you my personal suggestions.

As most people here already said your problem is due to simple depression.
Forget for sometime about theism or atheism.
These issues will only make your depression worse.
Take a step at the time.

Here is an old saying.........Mens sana in corpore sano ................is a Latin phrase, usually translated as "a healthy mind in a healthy body". The phrase is widely used in sporting and educational contexts to express the theory that physical exercise is an important or essential part of mental and psychological well-being.

https://www.google.com.au/search?q=mens+...e&ie=UTF-8


So start with physical exercises and healthy eating.
Once you find some benefits then start with the mind and once the mind has been fixed then you may start
thinking about what is behind the mind.

If this is of any interest to you please ask me about exercises and healthy eating.
All the very best.  Hi
Reply



Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Stupid things Atheists say... Authari 26 2138 January 9, 2024 at 9:36 pm
Last Post: Fireball
  What would an atheist say if someone said "Hallelujah, you're my savior man." Woah0 16 1961 September 22, 2022 at 6:35 pm
Last Post: Simon Moon
  Is it rational for, say, Muslims to not celebrate Christmas? Duty 26 3084 January 17, 2021 at 12:05 am
Last Post: xalvador88
  Atheists: What would you say to a dying child who asks you if they'll go to heaven? DodosAreDead 91 13674 November 2, 2018 at 9:07 pm
Last Post: LadyForCamus
  Anyone here wear atheist/humanist jewelry? Silver 24 4108 March 5, 2018 at 2:20 am
Last Post: rskovride
  More than half of the Uk say they are non-religious downbeatplumb 9 3074 September 5, 2017 at 5:04 pm
Last Post: Anomalocaris
  Do as I say, not as I do thool 22 7753 May 29, 2017 at 4:59 am
Last Post: Fake Messiah
  A challenge for any Atheist who been here for a long time! Mystic 36 5766 January 11, 2017 at 8:16 pm
Last Post: comet
  Is it fair to say? purplepurpose 53 8246 December 23, 2016 at 11:57 am
Last Post: Cyberman
  Can I just say why I love you guys? Won2blv 13 2710 December 11, 2016 at 3:05 pm
Last Post: Alex K



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)