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Current time: April 25, 2024, 8:53 pm

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Borowitz: Pence Has A Plan
#1
Borowitz: Pence Has A Plan
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz...EyMzcyOQS2


Quote:Pence Asks Jesus to Rapture Him Up Before Mueller Can Indict Him

Quote:The source characterized Pence’s request to be raptured up as “urgent” but did not indicate whether the Vice-President asked Jesus to rapture up any other senior Administration officials.“Some of these people will have to be left behind, for obvious reasons,” the source said. “Jared, for example.”
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#2
RE: Borowitz: Pence Has A Plan
Pence will restore the forgotten glory of holy crusaders. DEUS VULT.
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#3
RE: Borowitz: Pence Has A Plan
I'm sure there will be many volunteers to shoot Pence into the air, and see if Jesus will catch him.
Poe's Law: "Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won't mistake for the real thing."

10 Christ-like figures that predate Jesus. Link shortened to Chris ate Jesus for some reason...
http://listverse.com/2009/04/13/10-chris...ate-jesus/

Good video to watch, if you want to know how common the Jesus story really is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88GTUXvp-50

A list of biblical contradictions from the infallible word of Yahweh.
http://infidels.org/library/modern/jim_m...tions.html

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#4
RE: Borowitz: Pence Has A Plan
Oh my god that is hilarious. I can imagine a Rapture-themed turkey shooter - "Your annoying neighbors are going to Heaven! Shoot 'em down!"
Slave to the Patriarchy no more
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#5
RE: Borowitz: Pence Has A Plan
[Image: 6f5grrs.jpg]
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




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