Noah's Ark (!) Shows How Seaworthy It Is In A Storm

[KevinM1]

No evidence of a global flood
A physically impossible boat
A complete misunderstanding of how plants and animals work (I’d love to see how incredibly territorial animals like wolves, bears, and hunting cats managed to co-exist on a boat, let alone flora that exists in different climates)
A complete ignorance of genetics (Do we need to go through minimum population viability again?)

Yeah, man, the story is totally plausible.

[Anomalocaris]

Hence, double a ship's dimension, forced acting on it will increase by a factor of 8, while its strength will only increase by factor of 4.  It will be twice as weak as before.

If you make a 1/10 scale model of the ark out of exactly the same material, the model ark will proportionally be ten cubed, or 1000 times stronger than the real arc.

Excuse the brain fart.  An exact model made of the same material 1/10th the size of the real thing will be 10 times stronger, not 1000 times stronger.

Nonetheless the principle remains.  A small seaworthiness tank model may illuminate how the real thing behaves hydrodynamically, provided the waves are also proportionally scaled, and the test model is still large enough for water viscosity and surface tension not to become factors.

A small tank model is completely worthless for exploring the structural response of the real ship in the face of real-life marine stresses.

[The Grand Nudger]

Gorilla glue is a great adhesive for a model.  Not so much for building a giant wooden ship.

[Minimalist]

Plus according to the story there were only two gorillas and they needed them both.




Not to mention the fuckers stole the story from the Sumerians.

http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/gilgamesh/section9.rhtml

Ea had been sworn to secrecy, but he cleverly betrayed the gods’ plans to Utnapishtim. Speaking to the walls of his house, he described the plans, while Utnapishtim heard everything on the other side of the walls. Ea warned him that the gods would be sending a terrible flood. He told him to build a boat of immense dimensions, ten dozen cubits in height (approximately 180 feet) with six decks and one acre of floor space, and load it up with the seed of each living thing and with his family and possessions.

Truth be told, it is no sillier than the Noah bullshit story.  And the fact that an agricultural society's 'god' told them to bring seeds makes more sense than the silly jew tale.

[Anomalocaris]

Plus according to the story there were only two gorillas and they needed them both.




Not to mention the fuckers stole the story from the Sumerians.

http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/gilgamesh/section9.rhtml

Ea had been sworn to secrecy, but he cleverly betrayed the gods’ plans to Utnapishtim. Speaking to the walls of his house, he described the plans, while Utnapishtim heard everything on the other side of the walls. Ea warned him that the gods would be sending a terrible flood. He told him to build a boat of immense dimensions, ten dozen cubits in height (approximately 180 feet) with six decks and one acre of floor space, and load it up with the seed of each living thing and with his family and possessions.

Truth be told, it is no sillier than the Noah bullshit story.  And the fact that an agricultural society's 'god' told them to bring seeds makes more sense than the silly jew tale.

I know. All parts of the Bible are so surpassingly silly it overtaxes even the most incisively mind to name without hesitation which part is actually discernibly more silly than all the other.

[I_am_not_mafia]

 Do you even know the properties of gopher wood?

GC

Let me guess, it is a supernatural god wood.  It transforms on demand to being harder than steel, tougher than titanium, stronger than adamant

Maybe it is the wood grown from aroused gophers?

---

Ea had been sworn to secrecy, but he cleverly betrayed the gods’ plans to Utnapishtim. Speaking to the walls of his house, he described the plans, while Utnapishtim heard everything on the other side of the walls. Ea warned him that the gods would be sending a terrible flood. He told him to build a boat of immense dimensions, ten dozen cubits in height (approximately 180 feet) with six decks and one acre of floor space, and load it up with the seed of each living thing and with his family and possessions.

Truth be told, it is no sillier than the Noah bullshit story.  And the fact that an agricultural society's 'god' told them to bring seeds makes more sense than the silly jew tale.

Yeah but it's funnier imagining him going round collecting animal seed.

[JackRussell]

So:

Flood, no
Boat, no,
Phylogeny, no
Genetics, no,
Geology, no
Physics, no
Archaeology, no
Paleontology, no,
Environmental science, no
Histology, no
Paleo-linguistics, no
Genetics, no

Hmmmmmmmm.....

[The Grand Nudger]

Magic book - Yes, because god hates half breed giants. Just can;t stand the fuckers. He saw them cavorting around the earth, stealing all the good jewish girls... and said "Hold my beer".*

*to jesus, allegedly.

[Fake Messiah]

Magic book - Yes, because god hates half breed giants.  Just can;t stand the fuckers.  He saw them cavorting around the earth, stealing all the good jewish girls... and said "Hold my beer".*

*to jesus, allegedly.

Actually not because he spared them since in Numbers 13:33, we learn that after the Exodus the Israelites "saw the giants, the sons of Anak, which come of the giants."

I mean imagine that fucker YHVH that supposedly kills everybody and everything on Earth because of those half breeds only to leave them alive and well.