Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: March 28, 2024, 12:09 pm

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
#1
Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
Just to keep score, you know.

Anyway, this morning my TP collection fell over and killed me. I had two hundred of those "24=96" roll packages of Charmin, making me the most prepared non-prepper in St. Louis County. I am geographically specific because the cousins wouldn't put me in the top 100 when it comes to disaster preparedness. No. One has OEM Twinkies, because they have no expiration date.
Reply
#2
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
It hasn't killed me yet.

Probably in a couple of weeks.
Dying to live, living to die.
Reply
#3
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
I was devoured by Tom Hanks' crocodile.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
Reply
#4
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
(March 12, 2020 at 5:44 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: It hasn't killed me yet.

Probably in a couple of weeks.
You should plan ahead. The death queue will undoubtedly get unwieldy in a week or two. You wouldn't want to be found dead and not be buried, like T.rump, now would you?
Reply
#5
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
I'm from Alabama, one of the states that doesn't have corona virus cases, unlike the godless heathens whose sinful nature had caused Jaysus to smite them with this new plague. Thou shalt repent, and be healed by my thoughts and prayers.
Poe's Law: "Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won't mistake for the real thing."

10 Christ-like figures that predate Jesus. Link shortened to Chris ate Jesus for some reason...
http://listverse.com/2009/04/13/10-chris...ate-jesus/

Good video to watch, if you want to know how common the Jesus story really is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88GTUXvp-50

A list of biblical contradictions from the infallible word of Yahweh.
http://infidels.org/library/modern/jim_m...tions.html

Reply
#6
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
LOL. Watch this video, when the 4x4 lands at the bottom it's suddenly topically relevant.



Reply
#7
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
(March 12, 2020 at 5:47 am)Gawdzilla Sama Wrote:
(March 12, 2020 at 5:44 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: It hasn't killed me yet.

Probably in a couple of weeks.
You should plan ahead. The death queue will undoubtedly get unwieldy in a week or two. You wouldn't want to be found dead and not be buried, like T.rump, now would you?

I'm pre-empting the disaster by burning down hospitals.

Starting with mine.
Dying to live, living to die.
Reply
#8
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
(March 12, 2020 at 5:53 am)The Valkyrie Wrote:
(March 12, 2020 at 5:47 am)Gawdzilla Sama Wrote: You should plan ahead. The death queue will undoubtedly get unwieldy in a week or two. You wouldn't want to be found dead and not be buried, like T.rump, now would you?

I'm pre-empting the disaster by burning down hospitals.

Starting with mine.

Ah, you've gone over to the T.rump camp. Hospitals ARE the enemy, they report deaths and a spike in deaths means "somebody ain't doin' something!", which, of course, can't be T.rump's fault, it must be a legacy of the Obama administration. Or the Roosevelt administration, whichever one was the most recent.
Reply
#9
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
(March 12, 2020 at 6:02 am)Gawdzilla Sama Wrote:
(March 12, 2020 at 5:53 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: I'm pre-empting the disaster by burning down hospitals.

Starting with mine.

Ah, you've gone over to the T.rump camp. Hospitals ARE the enemy, they report deaths and a spike in deaths means "somebody ain't doin' something!", which, of course, can't be T.rump's fault, it must be a legacy of the Obama administration. Or the Roosevelt administration, whichever one was the most recent.

They can't be coronavirus victims if they die of something else, first...

Wink
Dying to live, living to die.
Reply
#10
RE: Post here if you've died because of the pandemic.
(March 12, 2020 at 6:07 am)The Valkyrie Wrote:
(March 12, 2020 at 6:02 am)Gawdzilla Sama Wrote: Ah, you've gone over to the T.rump camp. Hospitals ARE the enemy, they report deaths and a spike in deaths means "somebody ain't doin' something!", which, of course, can't be T.rump's fault, it must be a legacy of the Obama administration. Or the Roosevelt administration, whichever one was the most recent.

They can't be coronavirus victims if they die of something else, first...

Wink

Cousinmode: That's where the conspiracy really kicks in.
Reply



Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  God is listening because he cares! ignoramus 4 723 October 29, 2019 at 2:59 pm
Last Post: Cod
Heart Fuck Me In The Ass Because I Love Jesus Metallica 3 1955 January 30, 2013 at 4:24 pm
Last Post: Minimalist
  I'm Putting This in Politics Because It Seems to be True Minimalist 5 1550 September 21, 2011 at 3:28 am
Last Post: 5thHorseman



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)