The Statistical Improbability (Just My Luck)

[wolf39us]

What worries me about the OP is that he seems to have agreed to have kids even though he still doesn't want them just because his girlfriend really wants them and he really loves her. If that is the case, as it seems to be from what the OP has said, then that seems wrong to me. I don't think either parent should have kids purely because the other parent wants them whilst they themselves still don't want a kid. I think that if somebody is to have a kid, in a monogamous loving relationship, then it should be something that both parents want.

I understand that it happened by accident. But I think that's besides the point. The kid isn't born yet and I think that both parents should want them. So I would recommend abortion but I wouldn't recommend it if your partner definitely still wants it. It's her body and if she wants it then it's her choice. But I do feel sorry for the kid if only one of the parents want it.

So I just see it as a tragedy. But life is full of tragedies. So this is by no means out of the norm.

Trust me when I say that it worries me as well.

You're right, I never wanted or even liked kids.  
You're also right that it is her body and her choice.

I did strongly suggest to her when we first found out that this is not a good idea.
She is dead set against abortion and I DID agree to have one child with her when I married her.

I hope that all will be well.  I love her, and will take on any challenge that comes our way, even if it's one I've never wanted.  

As for the future, the two of us will be using two forms of birth control at all times (most likely with her using an IUD or implant).  
I will be getting resnipped, and life will go on.

[Porcupine]

What worries me about the OP is that he seems to have agreed to have kids even though he still doesn't want them just because his girlfriend really wants them and he really loves her. If that is the case, as it seems to be from what the OP has said, then that seems wrong to me. I don't think either parent should have kids purely because the other parent wants them whilst they themselves still don't want a kid. I think that if somebody is to have a kid, in a monogamous loving relationship, then it should be something that both parents want.

I understand that it happened by accident. But I think that's besides the point. The kid isn't born yet and I think that both parents should want them. So I would recommend abortion but I wouldn't recommend it if your partner definitely still wants it. It's her body and if she wants it then it's her choice. But I do feel sorry for the kid if only one of the parents want it.

So I just see it as a tragedy. But life is full of tragedies. So this is by no means out of the norm.

Trust me when I say that it worries me as well.

You're right, I never wanted or even liked kids.  
You're also right that it is her body and her choice.

I did strongly suggest to her when we first found out that this is not a good idea.
She is dead set against abortion and I DID agree to have one child with her when I married her.

I hope that all will be well.  I love her, and will take on any challenge that comes our way, even if it's one I've never wanted.  

As for the future, the two of us will be using two forms of birth control at all times (most likely with her using an IUD or implant).  
I will be getting resnipped, and life will go on.

So, it seems to me that the following is true:

(1) Neither of you has done anything wrong.

(2) Having a child you don't want is probably a tragedy.

(3) Having a child you don't want hopefully isn't a tragedy---and hopefully you will come to love your child and be a great father at some point after they are born. Hopefully sooner rather than later.

I'd personally love to know which of (1)-(3) you disagree with, if any, but you are by no means obliged to satisfy my curiosity.

[wolf39us]

Trust me when I say that it worries me as well.

You're right, I never wanted or even liked kids.  
You're also right that it is her body and her choice.

I did strongly suggest to her when we first found out that this is not a good idea.
She is dead set against abortion and I DID agree to have one child with her when I married her.

I hope that all will be well.  I love her, and will take on any challenge that comes our way, even if it's one I've never wanted.  

As for the future, the two of us will be using two forms of birth control at all times (most likely with her using an IUD or implant).  
I will be getting resnipped, and life will go on.

So, it seems to me that the following is true:

(1) Neither of you has done anything wrong.

(2) Having a child you don't want is probably a tragedy.

(3) Having a child you don't want hopefully isn't a tragedy---and hopefully you will come to love your child and be a great father at some point after they are born. Hopefully sooner rather than later.

I'd personally love to know which of (1)-(3) you disagree with, if any, but you are by no means obliged to satisfy my curiosity.

I’m solidly in the third category.

[Porcupine]

I'm all for hope. Hoping is superior to striving.