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Your personal decision
#1
Your personal decision
A hypothetical scenario (though not really, since I just saw it on a show):

For whatever reason, either you force your minor child to live at home with your presence s/he cannot mentally bear or you have to live elsewhere, for an indeterminate amount of time, until perhaps your child eventually is ready to have you back at home.

You can only choose one or the other. There is no family therapy in this universe.

A: stay at home
B: leave your home

Which do you choose, and explain.
"Never trust a fox. Looks like a dog, behaves like a cat."
~ Erin Hunter
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#2
RE: Your personal decision
I would leave, no question about it. The welfare of a child should be of paramount importance. To stay and continue to damage the child's well-being would be abusive.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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#3
RE: Your personal decision




Adversity builds character. Getting what you want isn't always the best thing.
[Image: extraordinarywoo-sig.jpg]
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#4
RE: Your personal decision
You forgot C: the child leaves your home

I can't live with my child, he's a pig.
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
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#5
RE: Your personal decision
(February 21, 2023 at 9:21 am)Angrboda Wrote:



Adversity builds character.  Getting what you want isn't always the best thing.

Adversity - sometimes - also breeds sociopaths.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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#6
RE: Your personal decision
(February 21, 2023 at 12:51 am)Tomato Wrote: A hypothetical scenario (though not really, since I just saw it on a show):

For whatever reason, either you force your minor child to live at home with your presence s/he cannot mentally bear or you have to live elsewhere, for an indeterminate amount of time, until perhaps your child eventually is ready to have you back at home.

You can only choose one or the other. There is no family therapy in this universe.

A: stay at home
B: leave your home

Which do you choose, and explain.

It depends.

If it's because I am being emotionally (or otherwise) abusive to that child, then the moral thing would be to have me leave my home and live elsewhere. In this case, chances are I am a lost cause and no amount of insight/understanding is going to make me a better person, so staying with the child would just continue to cause them harm. That said, since I am lacking empathy big time in this scenario, I would need someone else to drag me out of my home as I most likely would not opt to do so myself.

If it's for some reason that has nothing to do with me being abusive, but they nevertheless cannot mentally bear me, I don't know what the more moral option is here. I would hope that if there is any chance of immediate reconciliation between me and my child, then leaving would ultimately cause more harm than good. Plus, a child does need the support of adults after all. If not me (or the other parent, if they exist), then who would take care of the child in my absence? And would they do a better job?
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#7
RE: Your personal decision
How about you both leave. Send the kid to live with relatives elsewhere. Sell your current home, buy a lot of crack and have a mental holiday.
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#8
RE: Your personal decision
(February 21, 2023 at 1:03 pm)GrandizerII Wrote:
(February 21, 2023 at 12:51 am)Tomato Wrote: A hypothetical scenario (though not really, since I just saw it on a show):

For whatever reason, either you force your minor child to live at home with your presence s/he cannot mentally bear or you have to live elsewhere, for an indeterminate amount of time, until perhaps your child eventually is ready to have you back at home.

You can only choose one or the other. There is no family therapy in this universe.

A: stay at home
B: leave your home

Which do you choose, and explain.

It depends.

If it's because I am being emotionally (or otherwise) abusive to that child, then the moral thing would be to have me leave my home and live elsewhere. In this case, chances are I am a lost cause and no amount of insight/understanding is going to make me a better person, so staying with the child would just continue to cause them harm. That said, since I am lacking empathy big time in this scenario, I would need someone else to drag me out of my home as I most likely would not opt to do so myself.

If it's for some reason that has nothing to do with me being abusive, but they nevertheless cannot mentally bear me, I don't know what the more moral option is here. I would hope that if there is any chance of immediate reconciliation between me and my child, then leaving would ultimately cause more harm than good. Plus, a child does need the support of adults after all. If not me (or the other parent, if they exist), then who would take care of the child in my absence? And would they do a better job?

All fair points. The hypothetical can't be fully answered without more details.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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