Congratulations also from myself!

I would go along with the ceremony for her

Like thehedglin ssys, the compromise would not extend to how I raise the children.

Congratulations!

I think what you did is a reasonable and kind compromise on your behalf. Since everyone involved respected your position in it all, that makes a big difference. I would probably have made the same compromise.

I agree with others, I'd never agree to indoctrination of children though.

(September 6, 2015 at 2:12 am)Minimalist Wrote: Never faced that problem, man.  My wife thinks religion is as fucking stupid as I do.

Mine can't imagine how we find so much to say about it.  Religion is just all silly stuff to her.

in the future I could probably compromise to an extent if the relationship was strong enough

Right now, I just can't picture dating a deeply religious christian at all. Not sure about other religions. Still too soon I guess?

(September 6, 2015 at 4:39 am)Neimenovic Wrote: in the future I could probably compromise to an extent if the relationship was strong enough

Right now, I just can't picture dating a deeply religious christian at all. Not sure about other religions. Still too soon I guess?

Totally... but "deeply" is another story.

(September 6, 2015 at 1:26 am)Whateverist the White Wrote:

(September 6, 2015 at 1:14 am)Parkers Tan Wrote: Love is in part about compromise. If our love was deep enough, I would compromise.

Or if she was really hot.

Yeah, there's that.

(September 6, 2015 at 12:57 am)Starvald Demelain Wrote: As I see it, she included the religious aspects to please the vast majority of our friends and family and I'm fine with that. They're her beliefs (sort of) and since I don't see it as any skin off my bones I didn't mind. My only stipulation was that I wouldn't personally invoke any gods, and that I wasn't spoken for in that manner by the pastor (who readily respected my line in the sand).

Bold Mine

First off Congrats!

I think your "line in the sand" is an important point in compromise. Each person needs to let the other know where that line is and what they consider "crossing it". If you can't set those boundaries then it becomes a shaky compromise.

My wife is Catholic, but only in up bringing. She does believe in god. Our compromise is that we can discuss our different beliefs but not attack or change a discussion into a debate. We do like to tease each other and sometimes the tease will hit close to the line. If one of us does come to close, we both have a look we use to let the other know to back off. Occasionally we'll use a very sarcastic "Really?" to get the point across.

If I let my atheism stand in the way of a relationship in this part of the world (marriage/business/friendship) for all intensive purposes I'd be a hermit.

(September 6, 2015 at 2:12 am)Minimalist Wrote: Never faced that problem, man.  My wife thinks religion is as fucking stupid as I do.

Like you, I held out for a nice atheist woman.  I would not marry someone who believed in a god, so there would be no issue of compromising on this point.  

I would not marry someone who believed in a god for the same reason I would not marry someone who believed in Santa or leprechauns.  Such beliefs are too silly and I could not respect such beliefs.

People talk about "tolerance" and so forth when I say such things.  I tolerate the neighbors.  I hope to have better feelings for my spouse.  And in fact I do.

Other people choose differently.  Sometimes it seems to work out for them, and sometimes not.  I hope it works out for Starvald Demelain.

A friend of mine converted to Catholic from RLDS. I think being able to drink and smoke was FAR more import to him than any strictly religious concerns.

I guess I'm extremely lucky my wife is also Atheist.

Don't know if I'd be able to be married to a Theist.

Hmm.