Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: May 21, 2025, 4:15 pm
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

Thread Rating:
  • 1 Vote(s) - 5 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
joke time
arewethereyet Offline
Don't make me use my mom voice! FAFO
********
Religious Views: Yawn...
Posts: 17632
Threads: 134
Joined: July 10, 2013
Reputation: 65
#5931
RE: joke time
May 9, 2022 at 11:05 am
(May 9, 2022 at 10:40 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: I’ve gotten tired of the Gandhi version, so:

Julie Andrews changed her brand of lip gloss because the old one would flake to pieces and give her bad breath. In other words, 




Boru
Lalala
I'm your huckleberry.
Find
Reply
A. Secular Human Offline
Grand Poobah, Atheist Nerds of the U. S.
***
Religious Views: God who?
Posts: 1621
Threads: 0
Joined: October 2, 2018
Reputation: 11
#5932
RE: joke time
May 9, 2022 at 5:39 pm
(May 9, 2022 at 10:40 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: I’ve gotten tired of the Gandhi version, so:

Julie Andrews changed her brand of lip gloss because the old one would flake to pieces and give her bad breath. In other words, 




Boru

And here I was, trying to make it be something about "Maria".
Disappointing theists since 1968!
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
Power-Drunk Administrator
********
Religious Views: Headology
Posts: 47977
Threads: 550
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation: 109
#5933
RE: joke time
May 11, 2022 at 5:02 am
Fun fact about bees: They're actually allergic to pollen - prolonged exposure to pollen causes bees to develop hives.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Find
Reply
purplepurpose Offline
Banned
Religious Views: work
Posts: 2501
Threads: 158
Joined: April 19, 2013
Reputation: 19
#5934
RE: joke time
May 11, 2022 at 1:09 pm
God: I am perfect.
Also God: Drowns e v e r y b o d y.
Find
Reply
vulcanlogician Offline
δικαιοσύνη
****
Religious Views: I Grok Spock
Posts: 5813
Threads: 86
Joined: November 19, 2017
Reputation: 59
#5935
RE: joke time
May 11, 2022 at 3:41 pm
(May 11, 2022 at 5:02 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Fun fact about bees: They're actually allergic to pollen - prolonged exposure to pollen causes bees to develop hives.

Boru

[Image: e81c9fb4895f4ac38b3e144bb11c71fb.jpg]
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
Power-Drunk Administrator
********
Religious Views: Headology
Posts: 47977
Threads: 550
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation: 109
#5936
RE: joke time
May 12, 2022 at 4:07 am
A man and his girlfriend are about to make love, when she asks him if he'd like to 69.

'What's that?', he asked.

'Lie back and I'll show you.' So, he lies down on his back, and she positions herself over his face and unexpectedly farts. She apologizes, but while repositioning, farts again.

The man shoves her off, get out of the bed and says, 'I'm leaving. If you think I'm hanging around for another 67 of those, you're crazy!'

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
Power-Drunk Administrator
********
Religious Views: Headology
Posts: 47977
Threads: 550
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation: 109
#5937
RE: joke time
May 12, 2022 at 1:27 pm
Captain Picard: ‘Chicken. Hot.’

Replicator: ‘Please specify dish.’

Captain Picard: ‘Make it Tso.’

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Find
Reply
purplepurpose Offline
Banned
Religious Views: work
Posts: 2501
Threads: 158
Joined: April 19, 2013
Reputation: 19
#5938
RE: joke time
May 12, 2022 at 3:04 pm (This post was last modified: May 12, 2022 at 3:10 pm by purplepurpose.)
God: "Ask, and it shall be given to you".
Me: God please. I want tesla. And 5 billion dollars in bank account.
God: No.
Me: It was too good to be true. Dude is catfishing.
Find
Reply
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
********
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35598
Threads: 206
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#5939
RE: joke time
May 12, 2022 at 4:10 pm
(May 12, 2022 at 1:27 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Captain Picard: ‘Chicken. Hot.’

Replicator: ‘Please specify dish.’

Captain Picard: ‘Make it Tso.’

Boru

[Image: FOp-Tam-EX0-AAMN9-W.jpg]

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
********
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35598
Threads: 206
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#5940
RE: joke time
May 12, 2022 at 4:15 pm
What do you call someone who fails medical school?

A dentist.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  No joke -- I have decided to convert to Christianity! Jehanne 10 2989 April 23, 2021 at 9:54 pm
Last Post: arewethereyet
  A sacred joke. Mystic 15 3712 January 20, 2018 at 10:00 pm
Last Post: Cyberman
  Big Bang Theory Neil Tyson joke Brian37 1 1693 May 18, 2016 at 8:07 pm
Last Post: vorlon13
  There Has To Be A Joke Here, Somewhere! Minimalist 3 2700 October 1, 2014 at 10:57 pm
Last Post: Zidneya
  Joke Minimalist 59 19929 June 27, 2014 at 12:25 am
Last Post: Ravenshire
  A little joke Sup 11 5032 April 10, 2014 at 7:33 pm
Last Post: BrianSoddingBoru4
  Evolution (is a) joke JesusLover1 12 9749 March 2, 2014 at 6:24 pm
Last Post: Minimalist
  Preacher joke 02 Drich 2 2099 February 12, 2014 at 7:15 am
Last Post: NoraBrimstone
  Preacher joke 01 Drich 8 5128 January 20, 2014 at 12:31 am
Last Post: Drich
  Make Up An Atheist Joke freedomfromforum 5 3186 October 6, 2013 at 12:30 am
Last Post: Angrboda



Users browsing this thread: 4 Guest(s)