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RE: joke time
January 24, 2016 at 10:26 am
Why do they call it Wifi? Why not fi?
I do not understand why they call them "fire exists", why would you want the fire to exit? Isn't the entire idea to contain the fire?
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RE: joke time
January 25, 2016 at 9:23 am
What's green and smells of pork?
Kermits middle finger.
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RE: joke time
January 25, 2016 at 4:09 pm
(January 24, 2016 at 10:51 am)Brian37 Wrote: (January 24, 2016 at 10:12 am)Rhondazvous Wrote: “Again?”
If at first you don’t succeed, sky-diving is not for you.
Yea, that really isn't something you can fuck up on. Not like a Bugs Bunny or Roadrunner cartoon. SPLAT will put a big damper on your day.
Actually I have a friend who survived a skydiving mishap. His parachute failed to deploy properly. He broke his back.
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
January 25, 2016 at 5:45 pm
This man went fishing, right and caught a whole big basket of fish, but he didn't have a license. The game warden came over to see what was what.
Game Warden: What do you think you're doing with all those fish?
Man: You don't understand, sir. These are my pet fish.
GW: Pet fish?
Man: Why yes. See I bring them here and let them swim around in the water for a while, then I whistle and they jump back in and I take them back home.
GW: I don't believe that. You're full of crap.
Man: It's true.
GW: Show me.
So the man dumped the fish back into the water. After five minutes nothing happens.
GW: So, what now. Are you going to call them back?
Man: Call who back?
GW: The fish, dummy.
Man: What fish?
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.
I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire
Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
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RE: joke time
January 26, 2016 at 5:35 am
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
January 26, 2016 at 10:36 am
You hear about the new Catholic confessionals? The windows are groin high.
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RE: joke time
January 26, 2016 at 2:15 pm
(January 24, 2016 at 10:08 am)Rhondazvous Wrote: (January 23, 2016 at 10:06 am)Brian37 Wrote: I love how innovative humans can be, but why the fuck won't anyone invest in my idea? Who wouldn't want to invest in stringless parachutes?
Give it time. Right now the market is hyped up for solar powered flashlights.
I actually had a solar powered torch. It did store the energy in a battery though.
You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.
Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.