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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 4:52 am
I can tell you are all struggling with the profundity of my revelation, so here are some wise words to guide you:
Genesis 15:9
So the LORD said to him, "Bring me a heifer, a goat and a ram, each three years old, along with a dove and a young pigeon."
Deuteronomy 25:11
If two men are fighting and the wife of one of them comes to rescue her husband from his assailant, and she reaches out and seizes him by his private parts, you shall cut off her hand. Show her no pity
Deuteronomy 23:1
No man whose testicles have been crushed or whose organ has been cut off may become a member of the Assembly of God.
Kings 2:23
Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, “Go up, you bald head! Go up, you bald head!” So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the Lord. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.
Ezekiel 23:19
Yet she increased her prostitution, remembering the days of her youth when she engaged in prostitution in the land of Egypt. She lusted after their genitals – as large as those of donkeys, and their seminal emission was as strong as that of stallions.
I hope that clears up all your questions.
I must not be nasty. I must not be nasty. I must not be nasty. I must not be nasty. I must not be nasty. I must not be nasty. I must not be nasty. I must not be nasty.
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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 4:54 am
(This post was last modified: February 21, 2016 at 4:54 am by robvalue.)
Let's see, hmm...
Yep. That covers everything. You even answered some questions I didn't realise I wanted to ask.
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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 5:17 am
(February 19, 2016 at 1:05 pm)Lek Wrote: I'll only believe in you if show me that you can create a rock so heavy that you can't lift it.
You must have faith, my son.
Just believe what I say, and everything will be alright.
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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 7:25 am
What does God need with the Internet?
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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 7:29 am
(February 21, 2016 at 7:25 am)Cato Wrote: What does God need with the Internet?
umm...His starship is in for repairs?
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 8:09 am
(February 21, 2016 at 7:25 am)Cato Wrote: What does God need with the Internet?
I like to look at pictures of cats just as much as the next guy. Remember, you're all made in my image!
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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 12:05 pm
(February 21, 2016 at 8:09 am)FebruaryOfReason Wrote: (February 21, 2016 at 7:25 am)Cato Wrote: What does God need with the Internet?
I like to look at pictures of cats just as much as the next guy. Remember, you're all made in my image!
I think the point is that an all-powerful Being should be able to look at cat pics without the internet. Reminds of when Hitchens pointed out that nuns took baths in tubs covered by a canvas sheet, the ostensible reason being that God couldn't see through canvas and would not be offended by the nudity.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 1:50 pm
(February 21, 2016 at 12:05 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: (February 21, 2016 at 8:09 am)FebruaryOfReason Wrote: I like to look at pictures of cats just as much as the next guy. Remember, you're all made in my image!
I think the point is that an all-powerful Being should be able to look at cat pics without the internet. Reminds of when Hitchens pointed out that nuns took baths in tubs covered by a canvas sheet, the ostensible reason being that God couldn't see through canvas and would not be offended by the nudity.
Boru
Do not question the omniscience of God!
Just believe, and put all your money in the collection plate.
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RE: A Challenge to You All: Prove I'm not God
February 21, 2016 at 1:55 pm
Plot twist:
I'm a witness that this is god! February of Reason has performed a miracle and I saw it! Glory be to Holy Feb!
because everyone knows that "he said" "she said" is evidence.
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian