King James is the real Bible.

[Alex K]

BLIND MOWN!

[SteelCurtain]

Wait. Does the KJV make clear the horizontal vs vertical rock crusher controversy?

[Alex K]

Wait. Does the KJV make clear the horizontal vs vertical rock crusher controversy?

It's a bit ambiguous. It only says
And thou shaltst crush thy rock in that fashion which I, thy God, hath commanded.

But horizontalist scholars all agree that vertical rock crushers are probably an insult to God because they are reminiscent of the tower of babel, whereas horizontal rock crushers display the necessary humility towards the LORD up on high. The verticalist faction otoh thinks horizontal rock crushers are a monument to praise the rock-crushing strength of the LORD, whereas horizontal crushers, with their proximity to the netherworld, are corrosive for morality. Many wars have been fought. In fact, the entire population of Europe was wiped out twice over this controversy.

[pocaracas]

I think you guys should be using crossed or hybrid rock crushers, start vertical, do some horizontal action, then finish vertical again... like that ancient medieval torture/killing device known as the "cross".

[RozKek]

Oh Lawd, JEEZUZ, I can feel the prayers, hallelujah, I can feel it. I can feel it up my bum I can feel my stupidity growing for every second you think prayers help.

Every version of the bible is crap from different horses. In the end they're all horseshit.

On a more serious note do you mind presenting us with the proofs one by one so we can debunk them?

[Joods]

Hi.
The King James version of the Bible really is the only true word of God.

Based upon what?

This has been proven over and over again.

Where is this proof? Where is it shown multiple times?

I've never read anything that can disprove the KJV isn't real. Having read other Bibles you can see they do not compare as the KJV actually comes from the scriptures and tells you the real words of God and unlike other Bibles the words were translated correctly and not changed to fit other religions dogma.

I will pray for you all.

Again, proof KJV "actually comes from the scriptures and tells you the real words of God". See, it's all about proof.

If you say coming here was part of god's perfect plan, then you wouldn't need to pray because it would be pointless to do so. If you can change god's plan with prayer, then god's plan isn't perfect.

So tell me, because I have questions:

• Are you on board with ALL of the parts of the bible, even the not so pleasant one?
  
• How do you address all of the numerous contradictions that are in the bible? (Yes, gasp! they are in KJV too!)
  
• Do you own a slave?
  
• If not, why not?
  
• Ever eat Lobster or have steamed crabs?
  
• Ever eaten a taco or an enchilada?
  
• How about lasagna?
  
• How do you feel about bacon and pork chops and scaled fish?
  
• Do you put pepperoni on your pizza?
  
• Do you eat meat sauce on pasta? And then use grated cheese?
  
• Have you ever had chicken cordon bleu?
  
• Do you own a bathing suit/swim trunks?
  
• How about a suit?
  

If you're a woman:

• Are you married?
  
• If you're married, do you serve your husband even when you're so sick that you cannot get out of bed?
  
• Do you obey your husband, even when you don't feel well?
  
• How long is your hair?
  
• Would you object to your husband having multiple wives?
  

If you're a man:

• Do you have a brother lined up to take your place by your wife's side, should you die before her?
  
• Do you make your wife serve you at all times?
  
• Do you make sure you punish her accordingly if she does not obey you?
  
• Do you make her keep her hair long?
  

[Edwardo Piet]

I've never read anything that can disprove the KJV isn't real.

I call poe.

[Edwardo Piet]

Oh Lawd, JEEZUZ, I can feel the prayers, hallelujah, I can feel it. I can feel it up my bum

[robvalue]

I've never read anything that can disprove the KJV isn't real.

I call poe.

I think so too. Unfortunately the arguments of non-poes aren't much more sophisticated.

[RozKek]

I've never read anything that can disprove the KJV isn't real.

Let's approach this step by step. 

I've literally never read anything that can disprove the flying spaghetti monster isn't real. In that case the flying spaghetti monster exists. How do you argue against that?