You die one day and you reach the heavenly gates, God says to you, "

[The Valkyrie]

I'd go to hell.

In a few weeks I'd be running the place anyway and then I'd make it far better than anything superficial Vegas can hope to attain.

[energizer bunny]

I don't care much for angle hookers, booze, and casinos. Sounds more like a circus. Too fancy for my taste. 

I don't want to be tortured to death either. 

I would ask to be kindly sent back down to earth where i belong. Even if it means i come back as a ghost. I know a few people who could use a good scare. 

[ignoramus]

EB, what's an angle hooker?

Google suggested an angler's hook?

[ErGingerbreadMandude]

Google images result

[Astreja]

They both sound like hell to me. One is physically painful; the other would be mentally painful. I'd probably just shrug and walk away.

[energizer bunny]

EB, what's an angle hooker?

Google suggested an angler's hook?

I assume a hooker with wings lol. Hopefully chicken wings lol. The op came up with that not me.

[zainab]

Heaven... no doubt

[rado84]

"On the left side you have hell. It's just like how it's depicted in various works. It's so hot your skin melts, they put you inside large pots of hot oil and fry you for eternity. they will gouge your eyes out, rip your ears out and break your limbs"

"On the right side you have heaven. It's basically a better version of vegas. we have lots and lots of angel hookers, casinos, gaming stations, football fields, booze, lots and lots of booze. It's your reward for being a good lil lad."

"Look. I know you were an atheist. it's understandable, you did something stupid. you thought this was all bullshit but I'll make a deal with you - if you accept me as your God right here and now I'll let you go through the door that leads to heaven otherwise I'm helpless you'll have to spend the rest of eternity with dear old satan"

What will you do?

"See, that's the flaw of your claims: when a person dies, their body remains down there, therefore a ghost is just an energy, so they don't have a skin. You can not torture an energy because it has no skin and no pain detectors which are located right under the skin. If you still claim the ghosts in hell can feel the pain, that means there are living people in hell, which makes you a bigger monster than I've ever thought you were.
As for heaven, since I have no body it doesn't really matter where you'll put me - without a body and sexual organs eternity will be hell anyway, whether I spend it in heaven or in hell.
Lastly, I'm still an atheist. What I saw so far only indicates you and your angels and demons are just some kind of technologically advanced species that found a new chewing toy 2000 years ago and you have a desperate desire to feel magical. Which is why you keep claiming to be magical creatures which you are not but that wasn't enough for you - you had to enslave Earth and take away personal freedom from people. There was a word for that, I think - Narcisism or something like that. Not to mention your douchebaggery: "Believe I'm a god or I'll kill you" - sure, that's so god-like. More like a spoiled child trying to catch mommy and daddy's attention!
So it doesn't matter what you'll do to me after everything I said - the same physics you created says I won't feel a thing, so go ahead, put me in hell and I'll laugh at you from the pot!".

[brewer]

OP: I'd wake up, shake off one fucked dream, and get on with it.

Besides, that whole scenario sounds like a Twilight Zone episode. Sure heaven sounds like the obvious choice but once you make it a hideous hidden twist emerges. Dick no longer functions, loose every bet, all games cancelled due to weather, the booze is tainted with ipecac and every show is Andy Dick.

[ignoramus]

and the 72 virgins are virgins for a reason!~