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Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 4:23 am
I ask a friend of mine out on a date she says she will have to think about it because she recently returned from a year long service project and is having difficulty adjusting. Now, I think she is just not that interested. I have consulted others and they have told me that I am not entitled to know the reason why. Even though i think it's fair if she would just tell me straight up she isn't interested. I mean I have tried being persistent. I have talked to her about it twice, and she throws out the same response. I don't want to harass her, but part of me thinks that she should just be straight up and tell me I'm not interested. Would it be too much for me to say this? I mean it's not going to hurt my feelings if she does. I would also let her know that too.
Also, as someone who is normally shy and constantly being told that's my problem this is a big deal for me. I'm actually trying to grow some balls and stick up for myself, don't women like that?
I trust your wisdom on this. I'm not trying to be a dick either.
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 5:05 am
Leave her alone. She's not interested and doesn't feel comfortable straight up spelling it out for you that she's not interested.
Continuing to nag her and demand that she explains the obvious (regardleas or whether you refer to this as "standing up for yourself") is not sexy and not what women like.
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
-walsh
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 5:12 am
Are you on the spectrum? Are you aware that you may not understand a hint? Serious questions.
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 5:31 am
I don't fully understand it, but why should she give you a reason for not wanting to go out with you? Isn't a "no" enough? The women I have asked out and said "no" I've left at that, I don't need an explanation as to why.
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 5:31 am
(This post was last modified: June 1, 2018 at 5:35 am by Catholic_Lady.)
Sorry if that sounded harsh, btw. I didn't mean it to. I know it can be hard when you like someone and just wish tjey would give you more closure.
But please trust me on this, she really isn't interested. And it isn't appropriate to continue to nag her any further. You asked about it twice already, and that is fine. A third time would be crossing the line of respect for her though.
(June 1, 2018 at 5:31 am)Sal Wrote: I don't fully understand it, but why should she give you a reason for not wanting to go out with you? Isn't a "no" enough? The women I have asked out and said "no" I've left at that, I don't need an explanation as to why.
I dont think he wants an explanation as to why she's not interested. I think he just wants her to straight up say "No, I'm not interested" rather than say she will "think about it."
But many women don't feel comfortable being that straight forward, and the cues are more than enough to send the message out that she's not. No need to ask for more clarity.
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
-walsh
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 5:34 am
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 5:39 am
I literally have no experience in the asking out on a date department. I've never asked anyone out on a date.
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 5:42 am
I think you should just leave that sleeping dog lie.
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 5:59 am
'I'll think about it', does not mean, 'no'.
So don't feel bad for asking twice, that's her fault.
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RE: Are people normally this confussing when you are asking them out?
June 1, 2018 at 6:14 am
I'd respond but I'm having difficulty adjusting, sorry.
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