‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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Current time: December 15, 2024, 10:44 pm
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joke time
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(May 31, 2019 at 5:42 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Funding Healthcare In The US Put me down for $10!
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
This teenage kid wanted to apply for a job at a gas station in New York. The night before he went in, he went to bed with a can of Crisco so he'd wake up oily in the morning.
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.
I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers. Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities. --Voltaire Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
An octopus slithers into a bar and loudly pronounces, "I can play any musical instrument you give me!"
A disbelieving barman gives it a guitar, that it proceeds to play like Clapton. A patron leads it to a piano, which it proceeds to play like Elton John. Everyone is amazed. Finally, a Scotsman gives it a set of bagpipes. There is much fumbling and commotion for a few minutes and the Scotsman laughs and says, "So, this is something you can't play?" "Play?" Asks the octopus, "I'm gonna fuck her stupid the moment I get her pyjamas off!" Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???" RE: joke time
June 4, 2019 at 8:36 pm
(This post was last modified: June 4, 2019 at 8:40 pm by ignoramus.)
There's a new local band called 1023 MB? They're close but not quite gig worthy.
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear. RE: joke time
June 6, 2019 at 12:11 am
(This post was last modified: June 6, 2019 at 12:11 am by ignoramus.)
Apparently, being an executioner in medieval times was the job to have if you wanted to get a head!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
How many molecules are there in a bowl of guacamole?
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
How come Google assistant jokes are always puns?
I'm in two minds about Hitler.
Yes, he did a lot of terrible things. But then, he DID kill Hitler! Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???" |
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