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RE: joke time
October 12, 2023 at 9:24 pm
(October 12, 2023 at 5:34 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: ‘I came home from work to find that my kids had been on eBay all day.’
‘Maybe you should lower the price.’
Boru
Today I decided I didn't want kids.
When I got home I gave the little bastards 24 hours to pack and get out.'
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
October 13, 2023 at 3:20 pm
Stolen from Legends of Tomorrow.
We put man on the moon in 1969. His crime must have been horrendous
"Never trust a fox. Looks like a dog, behaves like a cat."
~ Erin Hunter
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RE: joke time
October 13, 2023 at 4:23 pm
(October 13, 2023 at 3:20 pm)Foxaèr Wrote: Stolen from Legends of Tomorrow.
We put man on the moon in 1969. His crime must have been horrendous
Stolen from Blackadder Goes Forth;
"Do you have a girlfriend back home?
"Skirt? No. When I joined up we were still fighting colonial wars. If you saw someone in a skirt you shot him and nicked his country!"
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
October 14, 2023 at 11:48 am
'I've invented a thought-controlled air freshener.'
'That's ridiculous.'
'Well, it makes scents if you think about it.'
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
October 14, 2023 at 2:12 pm
(October 14, 2023 at 2:07 pm)arewethereyet Wrote: ^groan
Thank you - that’s the response I was hoping for!
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
October 15, 2023 at 12:54 pm
Dates are easy for me to find.
I just take a look at the calendar.
"Never trust a fox. Looks like a dog, behaves like a cat."
~ Erin Hunter
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RE: joke time
October 15, 2023 at 1:37 pm
According to a recent study, 9 out of 10 people who are afraid of hurdles never get over it.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
October 15, 2023 at 5:30 pm
I still remember my first day of school.
There was me, my best friend Cassie, and a little Abbo boy named Charlie.
The teacher got us together and tried leading us in a rendition of "Old MacDonald"..
"You go first, Rebecca," she said.
So I said, "I"ll do chooks. 'With a chook-chook here, and a chook-chook there! Here a chook. There a chook. Everywhere a chook-chook!'"
"Okay Cassie, your turn!"
So Cassie said, "I'll do sheep. 'With a baa-baa here, and a baa-baa there. Here a baa, there a baa. Everywhere a baa-baa!'"
"Very good Cassie. Your turn, Charlie!"
"Can I do pigs?:
"Of course you can. When you're ready."
Charlie cleared his throat, "Okay, you black bastards. Get out of the car and keep your hands where I can see them!"
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"