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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
Why does heaven hate ham?

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Why does heaven hate ham?
WesOlsen Offline
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#1
Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 10:58 am
Stolen from a Hitchens chapter but chuckle worthy none the less. I probably won't even read the the theist responses to this question as i've actually read the likely origins of this completely bombastic law. It is one of many rulings that are dished out with little to no rational justification in much of the abrahamic bedtime story anthology. Peppa pig is grateful though, despite only being alive due to a disturbingly large collection of dimmocks thinking she's filthy and disgusting.
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Doubting Thomas Offline
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#2
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 11:10 am
I'd much rather eat ham than turkey on Thanksgiving. Ham tastes so much better and isn't as dry as turkey.

I'm sure when the bible was being written they didn't know about trichinosis and other diseases, so they probably thought when they got sick from eating ham or pork it was God's way of punishing them. Or, they considered pigs "unclean" because they wallow around in mud and generally don't smell good. But with our modern understanding of cooking methods to kill bacteria and parasites, there's no reason to eat meat from pigs.
Christian apologetics is the art of rolling a dog turd in sugar and selling it as a donut.
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pineapplebunnybounce Offline
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#3
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 2:42 pm
I had a friend tell me it's because pigs eat their own. And when I expressed incredulity she explained that were you to mince pork and feed it to a pig it would eat it. To which I said humans eat humans too. And humans do so knowingly.

I wonder how many humans would even know if they were served human meat? I hear it tastes just like pork.
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Doubting Thomas Offline
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#4
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 2:44 pm
They don't call it long pig for nothing.
Christian apologetics is the art of rolling a dog turd in sugar and selling it as a donut.
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Minimalist Offline Donators
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#5
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 4:04 pm
Quote:I'm sure when the bible was being written they didn't know about trichinosis and other diseases,

The shitballs who wrote the OT did not raise pigs. They raised sheep and goats.

The people they regarded as enemies raised pigs.

It has nothing to do with a bunch of iron age primitives knowing shit about disease. They thought disease was caused by fucking demons.
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Tonus Offline
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#6
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 4:08 pm
Besides, if anyone had eaten pork and died, it would naturally be assumed that he died from pure ecstasy because he WAS EATING PORK. No way they'd ban it. Heaven does not hate pork. BACON IS HEAVEN.
"Well, evolution is a theory. It is also a fact. And facts and theories are different things, not rungs in a hierarchy of increasing certainty. Facts are the world's data. Theories are structures of ideas that explain and interpret facts. Facts don't go away when scientists debate rival theories to explain them. Einstein's theory of gravitation replaced Newton's in this century, but apples didn't suspend themselves in midair, pending the outcome. And humans evolved from ape- like ancestors whether they did so by Darwin's proposed mechanism or by some other yet to be discovered."

-Stephen Jay Gould
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Minimalist Offline Donators
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#7
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 4:15 pm
God loves ham.


[Image: TheWarOnFaith-MP-Ken%20Fucking%20Ham.jpg]
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zebo-the-fat Online
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#8
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 5:31 pm
If eating pig is bad, why does bacon taste of bacon?
The meek shall inherit the Earth, the rest of us will fly to the stars.

Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups

Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling with a pig in mud ..... after a while you realise that the pig likes it!

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Doubting Thomas Offline
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#9
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 6:25 pm
Not just bacon, but a nice honey glazed ham...

Mmm, ham...

[Image: homer-simpson-2-the-simpsons-15836214-279-320.jpg]
Christian apologetics is the art of rolling a dog turd in sugar and selling it as a donut.
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Jacob(smooth) Offline Donators
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#10
RE: Why does heaven hate ham?
November 27, 2013 at 6:46 pm
(November 27, 2013 at 5:31 pm)zebo-the-fat Wrote: If eating pig is bad, why does bacon taste of bacon?

Oh well played sir or madam!
"Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken."
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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
Why does heaven hate ham?

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