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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 7, 2016 at 1:00 pm
(This post was last modified: December 7, 2016 at 1:05 pm by AkiraTheViking.)
(December 7, 2016 at 12:33 pm)Thumpalumpacus Wrote: (December 7, 2016 at 11:51 am)AkiraTheFighter24 Wrote: Yeah. I just, I can't deal with the thoughts in my head anymore. It's getting worse and I feel more trapped.
What are the thoughts in your head?
Oh nothing big just that I'm a failure. I can't keep a job much less find one. I can't provide for myself. I'm a burden on my mom. Nobody cares about me, I'll never amount to anything. I always over react to things. The only use I am to people is being a steeping stone for their success. There's other stuff as well I just can't remember at this point. Which is another thing I have to deal with. My crappy mind and body that just so weak and stupid. *sigh* I always overthink things, things that could happen, things that already happen. It's always a chore to get myself to realize it's not gonna happen. I'm so fed up of fighting it.
(December 7, 2016 at 11:52 am)Bella Morte Wrote: (December 7, 2016 at 9:12 am)AkiraTheFighter24 Wrote: Sad that I'm still alive. Disappointed that I haven't slit my wrists yet.
Dude, go see your GP and maybe he can refer you to a therapist?
They have free psychiatrists, but you need to be visiting a paid one in order to get a recommendation to see a free one. What's worse is that the free psychiatrist is the one that made my dad get worse, so I don't trust psychiatrist or therapists for that matter.
![[Image: 6QOh5df.jpg]](https://i.imgur.com/6QOh5df.jpg)
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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 7, 2016 at 2:20 pm
Tired.
"He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. For if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes unto you."
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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 7, 2016 at 3:25 pm
A support group might be the thing to try. I'd hate if you acted on these thoughts, except to deal with them constructively. Your value doesn't depend on your usefulness to other people. Do you think someone who has an illness that requires them to be cared for has no value? Being useful is rewarding, but it's not everything, and it's not the only measure of success.
I'm not anti-Christian. I'm anti-stupid.
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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 7, 2016 at 5:16 pm
(December 7, 2016 at 3:25 pm)Mister Agenda Wrote: A support group might be the thing to try. I'd hate if you acted on these thoughts, except to deal with them constructively. Your value doesn't depend on your usefulness to other people. Do you think someone who has an illness that requires them to be cared for has no value? Being useful is rewarding, but it's not everything, and it's not the only measure of success.
Thanks dude. TBH sometimes here is a good support group for me. I'm just not the type to be an attention wore about these things but today my depression and anxity was just too much. I will look into it, see if there is any around here.
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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 7, 2016 at 7:16 pm
(December 7, 2016 at 1:00 pm)AkiraTheFighter24 Wrote: (December 7, 2016 at 12:33 pm)Thumpalumpacus Wrote: What are the thoughts in your head?
Oh nothing big just that I'm a failure. I can't keep a job much less find one. I can't provide for myself. I'm a burden on my mom. Nobody cares about me, I'll never amount to anything. I always over react to things. The only use I am to people is being a steeping stone for their success. There's other stuff as well I just can't remember at this point. Which is another thing I have to deal with. My crappy mind and body that just so weak and stupid. *sigh* I always overthink things, things that could happen, things that already happen. It's always a chore to get myself to realize it's not gonna happen. I'm so fed up of fighting it.
I've been through long unemployment and reliance on others myself. I don't know you hardly at all -- we don't interact much here and therefore any words I might say are cheap, easily-said -- but if I had to say anything, I'd say "take action", attack the deficiencies you feel about yourself in the priority you've assigned them. The action you take may not be big, or successful, but I've found that for myself, the simple act of taking action helps me feel better about myself for making the effort.
And -- it's been my experience that "I can't" too often turns into "I never did". Don't bite on that hook.
I understand feeling like you're a burden to family, but it seems to me to contradict your thought that "Nobody cares about me." If your mother shoulders the burden, is that not evidence of her caring?
I wish I had something more to offer you than easy words, but I don't. But hopefully you can get at least something from this reply.
TL/DR: Move against the things making you unhappy -- take positive action even if it's unlikely to succeed; don't down on yourself for not living up to your own goals or self-image (because many of us suffer that too); and if you must feel indebted to your mom (like many of us), resolve to pay off that debt moving forward with determination.
Life ain't easy, not nearly as easy as these words. I hope the best for you.
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How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 7, 2016 at 8:54 pm
(This post was last modified: December 7, 2016 at 8:54 pm by LadyForCamus.)
(December 7, 2016 at 3:25 pm)Mister Agenda Wrote: A support group might be the thing to try. I'd hate if you acted on these thoughts, except to deal with them constructively. Your value doesn't depend on your usefulness to other people. Do you think someone who has an illness that requires them to be cared for has no value? Being useful is rewarding, but it's not everything, and it's not the only measure of success.
This is a lovely post. <3
Nay_Sayer: “Nothing is impossible if you dream big enough, or in this case, nothing is impossible if you use a barrel of KY Jelly and a miniature horse.”
Wiser words were never spoken.
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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 7, 2016 at 11:17 pm
(December 7, 2016 at 8:54 pm)LadyForCamus Wrote: (December 7, 2016 at 3:25 pm)Mister Agenda Wrote: A support group might be the thing to try. I'd hate if you acted on these thoughts, except to deal with them constructively. Your value doesn't depend on your usefulness to other people. Do you think someone who has an illness that requires them to be cared for has no value? Being useful is rewarding, but it's not everything, and it's not the only measure of success.
This is a lovely post. <3
Mr A has that way about him.
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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 8, 2016 at 10:16 am
I just hope Akira is getting some support in person, as well. Online just isn't the same.
I'm not anti-Christian. I'm anti-stupid.
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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 8, 2016 at 10:28 am
(This post was last modified: December 8, 2016 at 10:32 am by Joods.)
Well, I may have the start of bronchitis. Pisses me off because I couldn't go to school today due to constant, non-stop coughing and wheezing. FML
(December 7, 2016 at 5:16 pm)AkiraTheFighter24 Wrote: (December 7, 2016 at 3:25 pm)Mister Agenda Wrote: A support group might be the thing to try. I'd hate if you acted on these thoughts, except to deal with them constructively. Your value doesn't depend on your usefulness to other people. Do you think someone who has an illness that requires them to be cared for has no value? Being useful is rewarding, but it's not everything, and it's not the only measure of success.
Thanks dude. TBH sometimes here is a good support group for me. I'm just not the type to be an attention wore about these things but today my depression and anxity was just too much. I will look into it, see if there is any around here.
Please do look into it. Also, look at your user name. The fact that you have the words "the fighter" in there should speak mounds. Keep fighting. You are 1000000% worth it. 
Disclaimer: I am only responsible for what I say, not what you choose to understand.
(November 14, 2018 at 8:57 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: Have a good day at work. If we ever meet in a professional setting, let me answer your question now. Yes, I DO want fries with that.
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RE: How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?
December 8, 2016 at 10:52 am
Thanks guys. Since I've been having such shit luck on my own, I've decided to tell my mom, but after the holiday season. That way she can work out how to organize tings so that she can pay for me to go to therapy. I really didn't want her to know cuz she worries too much and it's more money being wasted behind me but I don't see any other way about it.
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