How long did it take for you to deconvert? What made you change your mind?

[Athene]

This is a really tough question for me. I never really viewed myself as being deconverted (an atheist) until just this year, but looking back I suppose my religious beliefs had been wearing away for a very long time. As  the years passed, I felt less and less comfortable with church. Religion was always a source of conflict  for my mother, other religious family members and myself ......I was always accused of not trusting in God enough, because I was never convinced that the act of prayer could solve a any serious problem.  I attended a Pentacostal church, and if you didn't know they really give Southern Baptists a run for their money in the crazy department. Speaking in tongues, being slain in the spirit, and faith healings were things I could never bring myself to believe in. I wanted to, but I just couldn't. 
A simple way to describe my deconversion-- I had always seen the holes in whole religion thing. Time passed. As I learned and experienced more, the holes got bigger and my belief grew smaller. What I was left with in the end was a room full of large, gaping holes and a tiny marble. I watched CNN's Atheist in America out of curiosity-- and was surprised at how much I related to them. Read some stuff. Marble rolled towards one the big 'ol holes. I asked myself some extremely diffficult questions.The marble teetered precariously close to the edge of hole. Thought a lot. Read some more. Thought things through. Marble disappeared.