(December 29, 2015 at 2:54 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: Sad to say, he's not that unusual, except for the part about killing 4.
Seen a bunch over the years at 12 Steppers. Back when I started you saw more of the full level of dysfunction, rehab wasn't real common back then. These days, most of that "rude awakening" thing doesn't happen at street level groups anymore, we see them when the insurance runs out, and they at least have a particle of the concept that life has changed for them.
It's bad form to even roll your eyes at a meeting when hearing their stories, let alone point out their odds of making it in the first go round are close to zero, and sobriety, relapse, apprehension, rehab, sobriety, relapse are going to be a recurring theme for years to come.
I've also seen all manner of bizarro from families; some spend copiously on rehab and lawyers, and when the kid comes back to the house, they allow 'social' drinking. Getting back together with old friends is obviously a bad idea, and for some reason, many are fouled out at family wedding receptions. Some sponsors make a blanket prohibition against attending events like that for their sponsees.
Rarest of all, but not unheard of, is one that actually gives sobriety a far shot, and after a couple years, announce they just can't do it, say goodbye to their groups and go back. Curiously, I actually have respect for that level of honest. Far more common is the weaselly approach, or trying to serve 2 masters.
Currently, an acquaintance of mine is in a downward spiral. He actually had over 10 years clean, then after some trouble in his marriage, relapsed pretty bad, and then caught himself. Worked his way back a while, and then 'lost it'. Don't know where honesty and cynicism part company here, but I expect him to die, and to make an even bigger mess of things before he does. Hell, over the years he's started 2 groups, sponsored others (has a reputation of being tough about it too), and ultimately the monkey on his back prevailed. Most but not all his family has bailed on him, the ones that are still hoping on his getting back to right are going to learn a very tough lesson of their own if they don't catch on before he breaks them too. He's already destroyed a large (high 8 figure concern) supplier/distributor business, and he will be like cancer on the rest of his extended families finances unless they jump on this, and very very soon.
As for Ethan, he's looking at a long road. I've watched many set out on it, and while there is the surprise from time to time, his odds seem quite poor, even compared to the sad average.
Food for thought.
