(July 29, 2017 at 11:44 am)Catholic_Lady Wrote:(July 28, 2017 at 9:45 pm)Shell B Wrote: Hobbies save me from my thoughts. Seriously, I have so many. I started learning to play piano a few months ago, I do pyrography, I paint, I draw, I do puzzles, I dabble in French, I hike, I garden poorly, I play video games, I read, I write constantly, etc. Without them, I'm not sure I could stand the passing of time.
All of that said, I run maybe seven blogs in different topics. Only one of them makes any money, so I don't pay for guest posts, but I'm happy to let people write and post anonymously or under their own names. My mental health blog would probably be the best fit for you to get some shit off your chest. I could even help you set up your own blog so you can have something to do. Tibs and I might start a hiking blog. If you want to map hikes where you are, we would love to collaborate with you. If there's anything we can do to help you stay occupied, even as far as having you come visit and chill by the ocean, let us know. I'm anxious a lot, but I hear I'm a good hostess.
Wow, this is incredibly nice of you to offer help like this.
I must admit I don't have a lot of hobbies because I feel like I'm juts not good or naturally gifted at anything. I'm one of those people where if I'm not good at something, I don't enjoy doing it. I know for a lot of people it's about doing something over and over again so that you can eventually get good at it. I admit I'm quick to lose motivation and don't take failure well at all when I don't do something very well. I'm sure that's part of my problem in general. I do stuff around the house to pass time and distract me, like clean, do groceries, make dinner, do meal prep for my husband's breakfast/lunch for the week, go for walks around the neighborhood, visit with friends, etc. They are distractions and do help, but at the end of the day they don't change the reality so it's a limited satisfaction.
I don't read books but there are various blogs I like to read, though I've never considered writing one. I have read your mental health blog several months ago and was blown away by the things you have to deal with. You mentioned things that I didn't even know existed like intrusive thoughts. It's amazing the strength it must take to deal with these things on a daily basis and still move forward. You are a strong woman. I may take you up on the offer of writing a guest post about self image and see if there's enough there to actually start my own blog at some point. I've never done much writing though, so we'll see.
I do like to hike, though unfortunately there isn't much of that around here except for the desert. I would love to visit sometime, if I can. The Appalachians are beautiful. Now that Brian got his next assignment he'll most certainly deploy sooner or later and I intend on doing some traveling during that time so I'm not just home by myself.
It isn't that anyone is "gifted", it is more along the lines that some people pick up things more naturally and others have to work at the same thing harder, and others still will never be able to do it. CL I felt the same way about "not being good at anything" growing up as you are expressing here. Lots of that is because far too often in America we judge people on titles and paychecks. We do things yes, but those are only one part of us, not the totality of us.
Success is also a highly subjective point of view too. Stalin was successful and so was Castro and the Kim family of North Korea. You to me are a real success. My definition of a successful person is anyone who expresses empathy for others and tries to get people to smile every day. I also in my life have seen tons of rich people whom are miserable jerks.
Don't try to chase what you think other people want you to do. Shell was mentioning hobbies to you to keep your brain active and that can be anything YOU CHOSE and like, there is no right hobby.
I love writing poetry, many of them suck sure, but many people like. But I would never tell anyone that is the only way to be happy or even there is only one right way to write a poem. It is simply what I like. And if I quit every time a critic hated one of them, I would have quit a long time ago. Point is, you can find something you like but it also doesn't have to be something that gets you a Nobel peace prize or makes you a billionaire. I may very well likely go to my grave remaining unknown, but that is ok too. Happiness is local and most people don't have millions of fans, most people can count those who truly love them on 1 hand. And if you have that you are successful.
Find a hobby or a charity you think you'd be happy doing, but more importantly surround yourself with people you enjoy. Don't kick yourself if you cant figure that out over night. Slow down, take your time, sample many things and you should be able to find something.
