RE: Is it normal be a hetro-sexual and having no relationship experience?
March 9, 2018 at 2:23 pm
(This post was last modified: March 9, 2018 at 2:32 pm by The Industrial Atheist.)
It's not average. But I can relate to you in some ways and I don't think it's messed up. I'm 37 and always been single. Often not by choice. I have schizoaffective disorder and have always felt kind of alienated. That, med side effects, and physical health issues have kept me from doing anything more than try to work. When I was religious, I felt like it would be wrong to be in a relationship because i knew I could never provide for a family. Now it's the worry that they won't want me because I don't work, and that, even if I found someone who did, they wouldn't really respect me and certainly the people around them wouldn't. I've seen women I know badmouth guys for not working. Granted in all these situations, both parties seemed to have lots of issues. But what they focused on the most was the guy not working.
I'd like to get out there and meet people(for friends too), and thought about maybe going to a coffeehouse or something, and maybe when I can get a ride I will. The public transportation here that I can actually afford is terrible, In my experience. They have failed to show up altogether, and when I did temp work at Goodwill they failed to pick me up for the return ride. I can't afford uber, or the better local transportation, or at least it would be a huge chunk of my available cash.
Thing is I don't know if I can even really just go up to people in a coffeehouse and say " Do you mind if I sit here?" Female or Male. Honestly I think my chances of getting a girlfriend if I try are slim. Better if I can work part time, but still slim even in that case.
It would be hard to do in the face of behaviors that have developed through evolution and traditional gender roles.
I see no point in using a dating site. If I don't have a job, I'm completely out of the running. It's easy to just run down the list of things. If I can get a shitty, menial job maybe I have some slight chance but not a good one.
Anyways if somebody did like me, I have no reliable way to get to them and back. This area sucks ass!
I'd like to get out there and meet people(for friends too), and thought about maybe going to a coffeehouse or something, and maybe when I can get a ride I will. The public transportation here that I can actually afford is terrible, In my experience. They have failed to show up altogether, and when I did temp work at Goodwill they failed to pick me up for the return ride. I can't afford uber, or the better local transportation, or at least it would be a huge chunk of my available cash.
Thing is I don't know if I can even really just go up to people in a coffeehouse and say " Do you mind if I sit here?" Female or Male. Honestly I think my chances of getting a girlfriend if I try are slim. Better if I can work part time, but still slim even in that case.
It would be hard to do in the face of behaviors that have developed through evolution and traditional gender roles.
I see no point in using a dating site. If I don't have a job, I'm completely out of the running. It's easy to just run down the list of things. If I can get a shitty, menial job maybe I have some slight chance but not a good one.
Anyways if somebody did like me, I have no reliable way to get to them and back. This area sucks ass!
