(March 10, 2019 at 6:15 pm)tackattack Wrote: So a personalized coached ceremony where the vows are coached and the ceremony reflects the pairs beliefs, lasts longer than a cookie cutter religious ceremony or legal justice of the piece; sure I can buy those stats, just disagree on your bias against religious weddings. Much like modern religion , when you just end up going through the motions you get shitty results and a lack of commitment.((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((9)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I think there is some confusion about marriages ceremonies.
A valid marriage is a contract between 2 people. A marriage only becomes valid when registered. (here that means going to the office of"births deaths and marriages", making a declaration and filling in a form.)
A church ceremony sanctifies a marriage. The "celebrant" sanctifies or 'celebrates 'the marriage. He /she does NOT 'marry' the two people.
Centuries ago, a marriage was considered valid once a couple had decided and agreed to be married. No witness was required.
That fact has never really changed in essence. A Christian would have a marriage is a contract between two people in the sight of god.
This all changed when the church claimed marriage as a sacrament. They got away with it because the very nature of marriage changed. Marriage was initially about children. Later , it changed to being about property and inheritance, especially among monarchs and the nobility. A bastard had no right of inheritance. All children born within a marriage were legitimate, it was irrelevant who the father might be.
That concept has not been used so much since DNA has bean available to prove parentage.
--"when you just end up going through the motions you get shitty results and a lack of commitment."
Not sure the results are due to "modern religion" (what ever that might be) perhaps more a case of modern indifference and the increased secularisation of societies.
Australia is one of the most secularised societies on earth. Most of us go to church for baptisms, marriages and funerals. Excuse the language; the rest of the time, "not a fuck is given". I don't except that morality is predicated on committed religious belief, so I'm not fussed.. However, I can understand how deeply distressing such a situation could be to a devout believer.
I have only ever been to one marriage where the hippy couple wrote their own vows. That was in 1971. They remain married.
Me? I got married in a Church; it was important to my wife and to both Catholic families.It was simply a practical thing to do. I considered my marriage vows binding ,as are any vows I have made voluntarily. It was my devout Catholic wife who ended our marriage, not me. (Australia has 'no fault' divorce)
