RE: Have you ever "ghosted" someone? Why?
September 17, 2019 at 8:44 pm
(This post was last modified: September 17, 2019 at 8:44 pm by mordant.)
Never ghosted anyone on social media or elsewhere. I have "faded away" as others have put it. I have an old friend from Arizona that I've allowed that to happen to. It has become a lot of effort to see him when I'm in town, and he was aloof the last time I met with him, so even though he has since said "we should talk" I have ignored it and let that fade away. When people act like that they are maintaining the relationship more out of obligation or guilt than from actual interest.
A longtime business colleague of mine quit working for the company I'm currently under contract to. I tried to maintain our acquaintance, went out of my way to set up an in-person visit with him when I was in the town he lives in. He claimed he was too busy. It's pretty clear he doesn't want anything to do with me. That's unfortunate because we've worked together in 3 different companies in the industry over more than 20 years.
I'm not sure the exact reasons why he left the company, but I found he's pretending everyone else he's worked with for years don't exist either. So it's not personal.
I think sometimes people do this to close a chapter on their life. It's not as common with work relationships (or as smart; in business, you never throw anything out of your Rolodex). But it's common in some other relationships. The canonical example is when you transition out of college and/or into marriage, and all your former friends lose interest. Another is when you have a major bereavement and some of your friends avoid you because it's uncomfortable for them and reminds them of their own mortality.
A longtime business colleague of mine quit working for the company I'm currently under contract to. I tried to maintain our acquaintance, went out of my way to set up an in-person visit with him when I was in the town he lives in. He claimed he was too busy. It's pretty clear he doesn't want anything to do with me. That's unfortunate because we've worked together in 3 different companies in the industry over more than 20 years.
I'm not sure the exact reasons why he left the company, but I found he's pretending everyone else he's worked with for years don't exist either. So it's not personal.
I think sometimes people do this to close a chapter on their life. It's not as common with work relationships (or as smart; in business, you never throw anything out of your Rolodex). But it's common in some other relationships. The canonical example is when you transition out of college and/or into marriage, and all your former friends lose interest. Another is when you have a major bereavement and some of your friends avoid you because it's uncomfortable for them and reminds them of their own mortality.
