How important are you?

[brewer]

OP: you've got an internal perception of your self worth, then there is external perception of your worth by others IRL. Your actual self worth/importance is somewhere in between. If your internal perception radically conflicts with IRL perception by others it's going to create some problems for you. This, in part, is of how personality disorders are identified. I believe your behavior indicates that you have one.

Not sure if you were saying this directly to OP or whether this is something that applies generally to all....

"you've got an internal perception of your self worth, then there is external perception of your worth by others IRL. Your actual self worth/importance is somewhere in between."

I want to say that there are some rich and powerful narcissists out there who are surrounded by people who value them highly. In this case, with that particular individual I's say their actual self worth may lie outside those two parameters. Likewise, you may have a nerdy kid with low self esteem who is surrounded by people who ridicule and devalue him. Same deal: actual self worth is not in between others' view and the nerdy kids own view of self worth.

What?

The rich and powerful have attained the self worth that they internally hold and the people around them recognize and reward that persons internal self worth (for the most part). Not all of the rich and powerful people actions/traits are necessarily admired. They become worthy only in specific aspects. Before you disagree, think about Donald Trump.

The nerdy kid holds an internal self worth and, whether low or high, will depend on the interaction with society around them and it's judgements. Surround him/her with other nerds-no problem, isolate them-no problem , surround with others who don't share the same societal values-conflict. Before you disagree think about Trisomy 21 individuals. They typically hold a great internal self worth, society almost always has a different view.

An individual can believe in their own internal self worth all they want till the cows come home. If that conflicts with the society that they live in/interact with, that's typically where problems develop. Isolate them from society, no problems. Institutions (isolation) are full of anti-social's, borderlines, schizophrenics and genetics.

You also need to consider if the individual can accurately perceive the feedback they are getting from others. Some can't, or refuse, to acknowledge the feedback that is accurate on a societal basis.

In Ahri's case, go back and look at his posts, many which contain magical thinking and a cognitive deficit regarding the interaction (outcomes/values) with others.

My original post was specifically regarding Ahri. It was not meant to be a blanket view of all individuals.