Woman loses lawsuit over "Girls Gone Wild" video.

[Scented Nectar]

Thus we get women playing turn-on games with no intention whatsoever of following through - so that they can play the victim - at the same time we have women who really do deal with us as though we were flesh and blood vibrators who should "turn on" just because they show up and want us turned on.

Hey, some guys do not mind that last one! Seriously though, it's not the dichotomy you present. I'm often really good long lasting friends with men I've been with, not in just a love-em-and-leave-em way. Sex can come and go with people, but it's the friendships that are the most important for the meaningful stuff. When they overlap, it's great, but it doesn't always stay like that. Personally, I don't think most people are naturally of the sort that is really able to promise forever, both sexual exclusivity, and continuation of their arousal by that person til they die. People have the idea that they must fit themselves into a marriage mindset. Some actually are suited to this, but many are not. You need to find someone who IS into that. I have no ideas how one does that though. At least with people being openly nonmonogamous these days, you have a better chance of mating up with someone who really is mono and won't surprise you badly some day.

One difficulty is that someone does have to have the tie-breaking vote in cases of sincere disagreement.

Why would it only be one person? Why would they not take turns? Or agree to disagree if they both feel strongly?

The result of this is that all the emotional needs that men used to get met through sex - the intimacy and connection - no longer get met in any way. Sex has become very mechanical and impersonal. Sex a lot of the time turns out to feel mostly like masturbation with an accomplice, who turns out to be someone you really don't like all that much.

Lots of women are looking for guys like you. You must be having shit luck meeting them. Usually it's women who more often need to have the emotions connected to sex. Romantic women outnumber romantic men. The odds are in your favour for this one.

Women don't seem to have a clue about the way that all the clobbering they do of men fundamentally changes men's ability to feel about them in certain ways. Those changes are not reversible, you cannot change a pickle back into a cucumber. The innocent crushes which young men have on women which can mature into deep long-term caring love, make men terribly vulnerable to women's ability to use men's feelings to manipulate them. Men have to protect themselves, so they become jaded and cynical and lose the ability to experience those feelings. Often, by the mid-30s which has become the target age for marriage, men have simply been jerked around enough by women that not keeping one is the better option.

Everything you just wrote goes the exact same if you were to reverse the genders. Or if you were to make the genders all the same and say everyone's gay. It's a human thing, and it sucks, but it happens. Sometimes humans are just assholes to each other.

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Hmm, I put stuff in my first paragraph above that should have been in reply to other sections. Oh well, people will likely figure out what I'm replying to.